grace of the Divine love. These souls then
love and enjoy each other, as if they loved and enjoyed God, loving and
enjoying him in truth, because they are God. Let us mount together in
spirit this steep and mystical ladder. Let our souls ascend, side by
side, to this bliss, which even in this mortal life is possible; but to
do this we must separate in the body; it is essential that I should go
whither I am called by my duty, my vow, and the voice of the Most High,
who disposes of his servant, and has destined him to the service of his
altar."

"Ah, Don Luis," replied Pepita, full of sorrow and contrition, "now
indeed I see how vile is the metal I am made of, and how unworthy I am
that the Divine fire should penetrate and transform me. I will confess
everything, casting away even shame: I am a vile sinner; my rude and
uncultured understanding can not grasp these subtleties, these
distinctions, these refinements of love. My rebellious will refuses what
you propose. I can not even conceive of you but as yourself. For me you
are your mouth, your eyes, your dark locks that I desire to caress with
my hands, your sweet voice, the pleasing sound of your words that fall
upon my ears, and charm them through the senses; your whole bodily form,
in a word that charms and seduces me, and through which, and only
through which, I perceive the invisible spirit, vague and full of
mystery. My soul, stubborn, and incapable of these mysterious raptures,
will never be able to follow you to those regions whither you would take
it. If you soar up to them, I shall remain alone, abandoned, plunged in
the deepest affliction. I prefer to die; I deserve death; I desire it.
It may be that after death my soul, loosening or breaking the vile bonds
that chain it here, will be able to understand the love with which you
desire we should be united. Kill me, then, in order that we may thus
love each other; kill me, and then my spirit, set free, will follow you
whithersoever you may go, and will journey invisible by your side,
watching over your steps, contemplating you with ravishment, penetrating
your most secret thoughts, beholding your soul as it is, without the
intervention of the senses. But in this life it can not be. I love in
you, not only the soul, but the body, and the shadow cast by the body,
and the reflection of the body in the mirror and in the water, and the
Christian name, and the surname, and the blood, and all that goes to
make you such