gs, it was determined to
seek a remedy: and an embassy was sent to some of our sisterhood then
living on Mount Hecla. They were put to a nonplus, and summoned the Devil
to their relief. To him the English presented their petitions, and
explained their sad case; and he, upon certain conditions, promised to
befriend them, and to give them a language. The poor Devil was little aware
of what he had promised; but he is, as all the world knows, a man of too
much honor to break his word. Up and down the world then he went in quest
of this new language: visited all the universities, and all {217} the
schools, and all the courts of law, and all the play-houses, and all the
prisons; never was poor devil so fagged. It would have made your heart
bleed to see him. Thrice did he go round the earth in every parallel of
latitude; and at last, wearied and jaded out, back came he to Hecla in
despair, and would have thrown himself into the volcano, if he had been
made of combustible materials. Luckily at that time our sisters were
engaged in settling the balance of Europe; and whilst they were looking
over projects, and counter-projects, and ultimatums, and post ultimatums,
the poor Devil, unable to assist them was groaning in a corner and
ruminating over his sad condition.

"On a sudden, a hellish joy overspread his countenance; up he jumped, and,
like Archimedes of old, ran like a madman amongst the throng, turning over
tables, and papers, and witches, roaring out for a full hour together
nothing else but 'tis found, 'tis found! Away were sent the sisterhood in
every direction, some to traverse all the corners of the earth, and others
to prepare a larger caldron than had ever yet been set upon Hecla. The
affairs of Europe were at a stand: its balance was thrown aside; prime
ministers and ambassadors were everywhere in the utmost confusion; and, by
the way, they have never been able to find the balance since that time, and
all the fine speeches upon the subject, with which your newspapers are
every now and then filled, are all mere hocus-pocus and rhodomontade.
However, the caldron was soon set on, and the air was darkened by witches
riding on broomsticks, bringing a couple of folios under each arm, and
across each shoulder. I remember the time exactly: it was just as the
council of Nice had broken up, so that they got books and papers there dog
cheap; but it was a bad thing for the poor English, as these were the worst
materials that ent