drove on the poor devil at such
a rate, that in order to save himself he was obliged to become a bankrupt
a second time. Thus I got rid of him; and by similar means I created in
this neighbourhood many an idler and a vagabond.

Though I thus lived in apparent kingly pomp and prodigality, my habits at
home were simple and unpretending. With thoughtful foresight, I had made
it a rule that no one except Bendel, should on any pretence enter the
chamber which I occupied. As long as the sun shone I remained there
locked in. People said, "the count is engaged in his cabinet." The
crowds of couriers were kept in communication by these occupations, for I
dispatched and received them on the most trifling business. At evening,
alone, I received company under the trees, or in my saloon, which was
skilfully and magnificently lighted, according to Bendel's arrangement.
Whenever I went out Bendel watched round me with Argus' eyes; my steps
were always tending to the forester's garden, and that only for the sake
of _her_; the inmost spirit of my existence was my love.

My good Chamisso, I will hope you have not forgotten what love is! I
leave much to your filling up. Mina was indeed a love-worthy, good, and
gentle girl; I had obtained full possession of her thoughts; and in her
modesty she could not imagine how she had become worthy of my regard, and
that I dwelt only upon her; but she returned love for love, in the full
youthful energy of an innocent heart. She loved like a woman; all self-
sacrificing, self-forgetting, and living only in him who was her life,
careless even though she should perish: in a word, she truly loved.

But I--oh, what frightful moments!--frightful! yet worthy to be recalled.
How often did I weep in Bendel's bosom, after I recovered from the first
inebriety of rapture! how severely did I condemn myself, that I, a
shadowless being, should seal, with wily selfishness, the perdition of an
angel, whose pure soul I had attached to me by lies and theft! Now I
determined to unveil myself to her; now, with solemn oaths, I resolved to
tear myself from her, and to fly; then again I broke out into tears, and
arranged with Bendel for visiting her in the forest-garden again in the
evening.

Sometimes I allowed myself to be flattered with the hopes of the now
nearly approaching visit of the unknown, mysterious old man; and wept
anew when I recollected that I had sought him in vain. I had reckoned
the day when