er, and got in to see the General
at once--a bluff, jovial fellow who said: "You go anywhere you like,
do anything you like, but don't ask me to get any Generals to sit to
you; they're fed up with artists." I said: "That's the last thing I
want." "Right," said he, "off you go." So we "offed" it to Amiens,
arriving there about 7 p.m. on a cold, black, wet night. We went to
see the Allied Press "Major," to find out some place to stop in, etc.
Again we were rather depressed. The meeting was very chilly, the
importance of the Major was great--the full weight and responsibility
of the war seemed on him. "The Importance of being Ernest" wasn't in
it with him. As I learnt afterwards, when he came in late for a meal
all the other officers and Allied Press correspondents stood up. Many
a time I got a black look for not doing so. However, he advised the
worst and most expensive hotel in the town, and off we went (no dinner
offered), rather depressed and sad.

[Illustration: III. _Men resting. La Boisselle._]

CHAPTER II (p. 016)

THE SOMME (APRIL 1917)

Amiens was the one big town that could be reached easily from the
Somme front for dinner, so every night it was crowded with officers
and men who had come back in cars, motor-bikes, lorries or any old
thing in or on which they could get a lift. After dinner they would
stand near the station and hail anything passing, till they found
something that would drop them near their destination. As there was an
endless stream of traffic going out over the Albert and Peronne Roads
during that time (April 1917), it was easy.

Amiens is a dirty old town with its seven canals. The cathedral,
belfry and the theatre are, of course, wonderful, but there is little
else except the dirt.

I remember later lunching with John Sargent in Amiens, after which I
asked him if he would like to see the front of the theatre. He said he
would. When we were looking at it he said: "Yes, I suppose it is one
of the most perfect things in Europe. I've had a photograph of it
hanging over my bed for the last thirty years."

But Amiens was a danger trap for the young officer from the line, also
for the men. "Charlie's Bar" was always full of officers; mirth ran
high, also the bills for drinks--and the drink the Tommies got in the
little cafes was terrible stuff, and often doped.

Then, when darkness came on, strange women--the riff-raff from