FREE BOOKS

Author's List




PREV.   NEXT  
|<   79   80   81   82   83   84   85   86   87   88   89   90   91   92   93   94   95   96   97   98   99   100   101   102   103  
104   105   106   >>  
hideousness more than Doctor Gys himself. When one poor Frenchman died under the operating knife, staring with horror into the uncanny face the surgeon bent over him, Beth was almost sure the fright had hastened his end. She said to Gys that evening, when they met on deck, "Wouldn't it be wise for you to wear a mask in the operating room?" He considered the suggestion a moment, a deep flush spreading over his face; then he nodded gravely. "It may be an excellent idea," he agreed. "Once, a couple of years ago, I proposed wearing a mask wherever I went, but my friends assured me the effect would be so marked that it would attract to me an embarrassing amount of attention. I have trained myself to bear the repulsion involuntarily exhibited by all I meet and have taught myself to take a philosophic, if somewhat cynical, view of my facial blemishes; yet in this work I can see how a mask might be merciful to my patients. I will experiment a bit along this line, if you will help me, and we'll see what we can accomplish." "You must not think," she said quietly, for she detected a little bitterness in his tone, "that you are in any way repulsive to those who know you well. We all admire you as a man and are grieved at the misfortunes that marred your features. After all, Doctor, people of intelligence seldom judge one by appearances." "However they may judge me," said he, "I'm a failure. You say you admire me as a man, but you don't. It's just a bit of diplomatic flattery. I'm a good doctor and surgeon, I'll admit, but my face is no more repellent than my cowardly nature. Miss Beth, I hate myself for my cowardice far more than I detest my ghastly countenance. Yet I am powerless to remedy either defect." "I believe that what you term your cowardice is merely a physical weakness," declared the girl. "It must have been caused by the suffering you endured at the time of your various injuries. I have noticed that suffering frequently unnerves one, and that a person who has once been badly hurt lives in nervous terror of being hurt again." "You are very kind to try to excuse my fault," said he, "but the truth is I have always been a coward--from boyhood up." "Yet you embarked on all those dangerous expeditions." "Yes, just to have fun with myself; to sneer at the coward flesh, so to speak. I used to long for dangers, and when they came upon me I would jeer at and revile the quaking I could not repress. I pushed my s
PREV.   NEXT  
|<   79   80   81   82   83   84   85   86   87   88   89   90   91   92   93   94   95   96   97   98   99   100   101   102   103  
104   105   106   >>  



Top keywords:
cowardice
 

operating

 

suffering

 

Doctor

 

coward

 
surgeon
 

admire

 

marred

 

features

 

countenance


ghastly

 

detest

 

intelligence

 

seldom

 
appearances
 

failure

 

However

 
diplomatic
 
flattery
 

repellent


cowardly
 

nature

 
people
 

doctor

 

endured

 

boyhood

 

embarked

 

dangerous

 

expeditions

 

excuse


revile

 
quaking
 
repress
 

dangers

 

declared

 

weakness

 

caused

 

misfortunes

 

pushed

 

physical


remedy

 

defect

 

nervous

 

terror

 
noticed
 

injuries

 

frequently

 
unnerves
 
person
 

powerless