at the
aforementioned social function. And while we kissed and embraced each
other with the affection of long lost sisters, still I could detect
above the odor of cocktails an underlying current of soreness. So we
clinched, but I took particular pains to see that we went clean in the
breakaway.

"A young gentleman from Pittsburg was one of the guests and this
creature naturally put herself forward to make him have a real nice time
and, while I am true to Wilbur, still I think it my duty to be kind to
every one. This Chicago party got the hunch that I was trying to beat
her to this Pittsburg wop and she managed to get him in a corner and I
could see out of the corner of my eye that she was making a strenuous
effort to reveal some of my past, and, while I have never done anything
that would cast a breath of suspicion on my spotless character, still I
knew that this party would not hesitate for a minute to do some
romancing, so I naturally edged over toward that particular corner as if
I was not noticing myself do it, and overheard her inform the gent, that
while I had the outward appearance of an innocent young babe, I was a
viper at heart, and had beat it out of Chicago with some ten or twelve
thousand dollars' worth of her personal jewelry.

"Shucks! All the jewelry she ever had was a diamond stickpin she bit out
of a gentleman's scarf when they were going home in a cab, and all she
had left of that was the pawn ticket.

"Naturally hearing the libelous remarks, I was compelled to defend
myself, so I quietly interrupted her conversation by remarking lightly
over her shoulder, 'Ah! I see, Laura, that you are still a member of the
Arm and Hammer band, and I wish to mention in passing that the only ten
or twelve thousand dollars' worth of jewelry you ever had you returned
to the property man every night after the ballroom scene.'

"As for me eloping with your belongings all you ever had was a dirty
handkerchief kimona, a Fluffy Ruffles skirt and a near-seal jacket, and
you had to throw a chill when you entered a cafe so as not to have to
take that off. If you had you would have been disgraced for life."

After those kind remarks Laura's goat naturally make a quick exit. She
jumped to her feet, and with one of those 'Parted on Her Bridal Tour'
expressions, said: 'It's you, is it, Sabrina; you were always noted as
the Butting-in Kid. But now if you have got all of that humorous
monologue of yours out of your system you