o never take fees--every infraction
by each of these individuals in his peculiar calling being set down as
a just cause of complaint against yourself, requiring an animated
correspondence in writing, and concluding with an abject apology and a
promise to cut the delinquent that day, though you owe him a half-year's
bill. These are all pleasant; not to speak of the curse of disjointed
society, ill-assorted, ill-conceived, unreasonable pretension, vulgar
impertinence, and fawning toadyism on every side, and not one man to
be found to join you in laughing at the whole thing, which would amply
repay one for any endurance. No, thought I, I 've had enough of this!
I 'll try my barque in quieter waters, and though it's only a punt, yet
I'll hold the sculls myself, and that's something.

'So much for the self-gratulation I indulged in, as the old _chaise de
poste_ rattled over the heavy pavement, and drew up short at the portico
of my future dwelling. My wife was charmed with the procession
of villagers who awaited us on the steps, and (although an uglier
population never trod their mother earth in wooden slippers) fancied
she could detect several faces of great beauty and much interest in the
crowd. For my part, I saw nothing but an indiscriminate haze of cotton
nightcaps, striped jackets, blouses, black petticoats and sabots; so,
pushing my way through them, I left the bassoon and the burgomaster to
the united delights of their music and eloquence, and shutting the hall
door threw myself on a seat, and thanked Heaven that my period of peace
and tranquillity was at length to begin.

'Peace and tranquillity! What airy visions! Had I selected the post of
cad to an omnibus, a steward to a Greenwich steamer, were I a guide to
the Monument or a waiter at Long's my life had been one of dignified
repose in comparison with my present existence.

'I had not been a week in the chateau when a travelling Englishman
sprained his ankle within a short distance of the house. As a matter of
course he was brought there, and taken every care of for the few days of
his stay. He was fed, housed, leeched, and stuped, and when at length
he proceeded upon his journey was profuse in his acknowledgments for
the services rendered him; and yet what was the base return of the
ungrateful man? I have scarcely temper to record it. During the very
moment when we were most lavish in our attention to him, he was sapping
the very peace of his benefactors. He l