beer with them and
passing a few comradely remarks; they then proceeded to the large dining
hall and took their places with the gorgeously caparisoned and
bemedalled chieftains of the German Army. The whole proceeding has an
historic interest, in that it was the last Schrippenfest held. Whether
another will ever be held is problematical, for the occasion was an
inevitable part of the trappings of Hohenzollernism. Despite the gravity
of the occasion, Colonel House's chief memory of this function is
slightly tinged with the ludicrous. He had spent the better part of a
lifetime attempting to rid himself of his military title, but uselessly.
He was now embarrassed because these solemn German officers persisted
in regarding him as an important part of the American Army, and in
discussing technical and strategical problems. The visitor made several
attempts to explain that he was merely a "geographical colonel"--that
the title was constantly conferred in an informal sense on Americans,
especially Southerners, and that the handle to his name had, therefore,
no military significance. But the round-faced Teutons stared at his
explanation in blank amazement; they couldn't grasp the point at all,
and continued to ask his opinion of matters purely military.

When the lunch was finished, the Kaiser took Colonel House aside, and
the two men withdrew to the terrace, out of earshot of the rest of the
gathering. However, they were not out of sight. For nearly half an hour
the Kaiser and the American stood side by side upon the terrace, the
German generals, at a respectful distance, watching the proceeding,
resentful, puzzled, curious as to what it was all about. The quiet
demeanour of the American "Colonel," his plain citizen's clothes, and
his almost impassive face, formed a striking contrast to the Kaiser's
dazzling uniform and the general scene of military display. Two or three
of the generals and admirals present were in the secret, but only two or
three; the mass of officers watching this meeting little guessed that
the purpose of House's visit was to persuade the Kaiser to abandon
everything for which the Schrippenfest stood; to enter an international
compact with the United States and Great Britain for reducing armaments,
to reach an agreement about trade and the treatment of backward peoples,
and to form something of a permanent association for the preservation of
peace. The one thing which was apparent to the watchers was that