By _coemptio_--a mock sale
to her husband[28]; II. By _confarreatio_--a solemn marriage with
peculiar sacred rites to qualify men and women and their children for
certain priesthoods[29]; III. By _usus_, or acquisition by prescription.
A woman became a man's legal wife by _usus_ if he had lived with her one
full year and if, during that time, she had not been absent from him for
more than three successive nights.[30]

All these forms, however, had either been abolished by law or had fallen
into desuetude during the second century of our era, as is evident from
Gaius.[31] A man could marry even if not present personally; a woman
could not.[32] The woman's parents or guardians were accustomed to
arrange a match for her,[33] as they still do in many parts of Europe.
Yet the power of the father to coerce his daughter was limited. Her
consent was important. "A marriage cannot exist," remarks Paulus,
"unless all parties consent."[34] Julianus writes also that the daughter
must give her permission[35]; yet the statement of Ulpian which
immediately follows in the Digest shows that she had not complete free
will in the matter: "It is understood that she who does not oppose the
wishes of her father gives consent. But a daughter is allowed to object
only in case her father chooses for her a man of unworthy or disgraceful
character."[36] The son had an advantage here, because he could never be
forced into a marriage against his will.[37] The consent of the father
was always necessary for a valid marriage.[38] He could not by will
compel his daughter to marry a certain person.[39] After she was
married, he still retained power over her, unless she became independent
by the birth of three children; but this was largely to protect her and
represent her in court against her husband if necessity should
arise.[40] A father was not permitted to break up a harmonious[41]
marriage; he could not get back his daughter's dowry without her
consent,[42] nor force her to return to her husband after a divorce[43];
and he was punished with loss of citizenship if he made a match for a
widowed daughter before the legal time of mourning for her husband had
expired.[44] A daughter passed completely out of the power of her father
only if she became _sui iuris_ by the birth of three children or if she
became a Vestal, or again if she married a special priest of Jupiter
(_Flamen Dialis_), in which case, however, she passed completely into
the power of her