n that
seemed as stately as an _elephant_, though to my thinking he is a
_bundle_ of conceit, all _outside_ show; in short, a piece of
_lumberhand_, on whom I would not _waste paper_ to write him a _note_.

My journeyman, who is but a _demy_ sort of a chap, will make but a
_small hand_ of the bills, and I shall go to _pott_. You also will be a
sufferer, if you _post_-pone sending my _paper_, for you shall have
neither _plate paper_,[1] nor a _single crown_, no, nor a _cartridge_ of
halfpence from me this half year, unless you play your _cards_ better. I
have more bills to write out than a _bag cap_, made of the largest
_grand eagle_ you have in your warehouse, could contain; so that I shall
look as _blue_ as your _sugar_-paper, and bestow on you to boot some
very ugly prayers, not in _single hand_, but by _thick_ and _thin
couples_, that will be a _fine copy_ for my young man to take example by,
if you disappoint.

Your humble servant, J. J.

[1] Bank notes.

* * * * *

RUSTIC SIMPLICITY.

A village pastor was examining his parishioners in their Catechism. The
first question in the Heidelberg Catechism is this: "What is thy only
consolation in life and in death?" A young girl, to whom the pastor put
this question, laughed, and would not answer. The priest insisted. "Well,
then," said she, at length, "if I must tell you, it is the young shoemaker,
who lives in the Rue Agneaux."

* * * * *

TALL PEOPLE.

The king of France, being at Calais, sent over an embassador, a verie tall
person, upon no other errand but a complement to the king of England. At
his audience he appeared in such a light garb, that afterwards the king
ask'd Lord-keeper Bacon "what he thought of the French embassador?" He
answer'd, "That he was a verie proper man."--"I," his majestie replied,
"but what think you of his head-piece? is he a proper man for the office,
of an embassador?"--"Sir," returned he, "it appears too often, _that tall
men are like high houses of four or five stories, wherein commonlie the
upper-most room is worst-furnished_."

* * * * *

The following anecdote is perfectly indicative of that dry humour which
forms what Oxonians call a _cool hand_:--When Mr. Gurney, afterwards
rector of Edgefield, in Norfolk, held a fellowship of Bene't, the master
had a desire to get possession of the fel