n' den, my feller-sitterzens, by jiggernometrical injuction, de
persac valyer of de quantitums k and l in de trombonial k-l-u, we will
now perceed to exburden our conshusness of sum thoughts havin' reffermence
to de avowal u. If dat which needs no splainin' may be made de subjec' of
splainatory logic, widout on de oder han' rejucin' de speaker to de
distressin' condishun of hyperbolus, I shall, in a brefe space of time,
more or less, egshibit to dis orgunce de close anallumgy dat exists
betwixt de avowal u, and de pussonal pronoun "you." I takes it for
granted, Mr. Cheermon, dat every individooal dat has a place in dis orguss
resemblage, am fermilliar, either by "hearsay" or "theysay," wid dat
principul of de Common Law dat purvides dat whar wurds are to be
miscomterpreted, dat de meanin' is to be fastened onto um what am neares'
at han', and dat if dey am already purvided wid a resonably far
siggerfication, dat it shall be onlawful to prowl off in sarch of one what
soots yer better. Dat pint bein' settled, I will not do enny gemmen in dis
orgunce de misrespex to persoom dat if a Klu-Krux wur to pint a six-bar'l
blunderbuss under his oil-factory of smell, and say "you," as loud and
suddint as a clap of armytillery, dat he would disclude dat he meant sum
odder feller, and fail to locomoshy in de odder direction. Takin' den, my
feller-sitterzens, de consummants k and l in de trombonial (trinomial)
k-l-u, and it will be seen dat dey have close refermence to de avowal u,
and _visum versum_, and dat in dese three alfumbettycle cosines, and de
mistickle siggerfication detached to each, ar' de whole substanshuation
of de mystiffercation of de Klu-Krux-Klam.

Den, Mr. Cheermon and feller-sitterzens, if dese be de mos' obdurous
intenshuns of dose ruffumlians, duz it not, let me ax, bemoove this loil
body to take immejit steps to surcumvalidate, deturrimerate,
homswogglemerate, and murder-r-r-- [This expression stuck in the speaker's
throat, for, being attracted from the up-stairs of his eloquence by what
he at first mistook for an outburst of enthusiasm on the part of his
hearers, but was afterwards induced to believe proceeded from some more
serious cause, he looked around him upon great waves of panic that lashed
the building from side to side--at first converting all obstacles into a
causeway for their terror, but at length flowing into currents that beat
strongest where the drifts of wrecked and storm-tossed furniture formed