The circumstance which I am about to relate," said Mr. Spout, "is one
in which a friend of mine was involved. My friend's name," he continued,
"is Bartholomew Buxton. He is the owner of a book-store, and was led
into that business on account of a thirst for reading. He is a man of
about thirty-five years, and his whole life has been passed in poring
over books. I regard him as a man of very rare intelligence, though his
intellect is not, perhaps, very fruitful of original thoughts. What is
remarkable with him is his personal appearance. He is a little man, just
large enough to be entitled to enter the army--that is to say,
'five-foot-four.' His body is very small, and his head very large,
round, and full. His hair is of a sandy color, and of the scratch wig
order of cut. His eyes are small, and one of them squints frightfully.
His complexion is quite pale. In the matter of dress, he wears usually a
pair of pants of a checker-board-pattern-on-a-large-scale cloth, blue
dress-coat, ornamented with large fancy brass buttons, and a vest--a
double-breaster--of the brightest scarlet. But these eccentricities in
apparel would hardly attract attention so long as the main feature of
his dress is visible. That feature is his collar. It is a remarkable
collar--a mighty rampart of linen, which encircles his head in a line
with the centres of his ears, almost meeting in his face. Numerous
reasons have been assigned for Mr. Buxton's going to such lengths (or
rather heights) in his indulgence in collar. One idea advanced is, that
he is actuated by a desire to economize in the expenses of washing, and
to do this, has the garments made in such a way as to be convertible
into collars at either end. Another suggestion is, that the collar is a
matter of utility, designed by Mr. Buxton to economize physical
strength, which, inasmuch as his head is very large and his body very
small, must be overtaxed to hold his ponderous brain-box erect.

"Gentlemen, three days since I received a call from my friend Buxton. He
appeared melancholy and dejected, which surprised me; but what surprised
me more, in respect to his present appearance, was the manifest
disarrangement of his collar. It did not stand up on one side with the
majestic erectness which characterized it on the other. On the left it
was hanging down flabbily; its self-sustaining power was departed.

"I saw, by his countenance, that something important to him had
occurred, and the appearanc