self-control.--And the feeling doesn't last! Look at you, for instance.
I suppose once you were in love with my father?"
Kate nodded.
"And then in a very little while you were in love with--some one else.
Did it make you any happier, all that loving, or any better? I think
not. Only unhappier, in the long run.--No, no, Mother! I don't want it.
I don't want _any_ emotions!"--She spoke with a queer distaste, the same
fastidious shrinking with which she had often watched Jacqueline
cuddling Mag's baby. "I only want to be safe."
"Marriage isn't always safe, my little girl."
"Mine will be. That's why I've chosen Professor Jim."
Kate made a helpless gesture with her hands. "Child, you don't know what
you're giving up! You can't!"
Jemima swallowed hard. The confession she had to make was not easy.
"Yes, I do. Because I tried love first, to be sure."
"My dear! You--tried love?"
"There was a young man--You remember, Jacqueline called him 'the most
beautiful man in the room'? He was very handsome, and--nice to me.
That's why I went to visit Mrs. Lawton, chiefly. I wanted to see more of
him.--Whenever he touched my hand, or even my dress, little shivers ran
up my back. I--I liked it. That's being in love, isn't it? Sometimes we
went driving, in a buggy. Once it was moonlight, and I knew when we
started that something was going to happen.--I meant it to. I flirted
with him."
"Did you, dear!" murmured the mother, between tears and laughter. "I
didn't suppose you knew how!"
"Oh, those things come, somehow. I've watched Jacky.--After a while, he
kissed me. But do you know, Mother, that was the end of everything! I
stopped having thrills the minute he did it. His mouth was so--so mushy,
and his nose seemed to get in the way.--Still, I went on flirting. I
wanted to give him every chance.--He didn't kiss me again, though. When
we got home I asked him why that was. He said it was because he
respected me too much."
She made a scornful gesture, "You see, it's just as I thought! Kisses
and all that sort of thing have nothing to do with respect, with real
liking. And if my own thrills couldn't outlast one moonlight buggy-ride,
they would not do to marry on. It will be better for me to marry on
respect."
"But poor Jim!" said Kate, unsteadily. "Must he, too, marry on respect?"
Jemima met her gaze candidly. "Why, no. Men are different, I think, even
intellectual ones. He has thrills. I can feel him having them, whe
|