take yer h'upstairs to to say that there
recitltation to my lady friends. Come along!

Doctor. _(rising)_ No, no, I'm not in a funny humour!

Mrs. O'H. Ho! but I'm going to take 'arf a crown off the
rint-book for yer doin' of it--ap come along! _(drags him)_

Doctor. No, no--I really can't--I've had a terribly busy day and
I'm too--tired!

Mrs. O'H. Too proud, you mean. But, mark my word, if you don't
come h'up--

Doctor. _(aside, absently)_ I _shall_ come _h'up_ three times.

Mrs. O'H. Your pride'll 'ave a fall, and a very 'umblin' fall!

_(Exit Mrs. O'Hara, with dignity.)_

Doctor. _(alone)_ I wonder if the fall from the Albert Suspension
is worse than Waterloo Bridge? _(sits looking miserable)_

_(Enter Aurora. looking more miserable.)_

Aurora. _(aside)_ It's now or never. I must tell 'im, I must.

Doctor _(aside)_ I wonder if I ought to keep that appointment
with my father-in-law first. No! I'll spare him the trouble.

Aurora. _(aside)_ Now, when I come to think of it, there's not
only them three girls settin' their frills at 'im, but there's
the lady without any clothes in there, _(points to bathroom)_
That's four of 'em, but I'll struggle with the lot.

Doctor. _(aside)_ I'll go now. _(rises)_ Oh, I do feel so
nervous, _(pours out whiskey, going to add water)_ N--no! I shall
get enough water afterwards, _(drinks)_

Aurora. _(aside)_ I'll be 'is patient! They all do it that way.
I've learnt the symptoms off the letter, I'll see if I know 'em.
_(repeats them to herself with action)_

Doctor. _(aside)_ Courage, courage! _(strikes his chest, going)_
No, I can't go in these! _(looks at pyjamas)_ I can't drown
myself in pyjamas, and I've left my only trousers in there, and
I can't get 'em--how--how very annoying, _(sits again, much
relieved)_ I can't drown myself.

Aurora. _(standing C. end of sofa, leaning head on cushion)_ Ho,
sir, I do feel queer.

Doctor. _(looking round)_ What's the matter?

Aurora. I'ye got all sorts of normal fancies, an'--
longin's--hawful longin's, sir--I think I'm longin' to drown
myself.

Doctor. _(suddenly)_ Don't say that! I'm surprised at you--don't
you know it's only cowards who want to drown themselves. Come
now, sit down! What's the trouble, eh?

Aurora. _(vacantly)_ The trouble, sir?

Doctor. What can I _do_ for you?

Aurora. I dunno, sir, what _can_ you do for me?

Doctor. No, you don't understand. What are your symptoms?

Aurora. _(effusively)_ Oh!!