d Mrs. Bardell.

The next witness was Mr. Winkle, and after him came Mr. Tupman, and Mr.
Snodgrass, all of whom appeared on subpoena by the plaintiff's lawyers.

Sergeant Buzfuz then rose and said, with considerable importance, "Call
Samuel Weller."

It was quite unnecessary to call him, for Samuel Weller stepped briskly
into the box the instant his name was pronounced.

"What's your name, sir?" inquired the judge.

"Sam Weller, my lord."

"Do you spell it with a 'V or a 'W?" inquired the judge.

"That depends upon the taste and fancy of the speller, my lord," replied
Sam, "but I spells it with a 'V.'"

Here a voice in the gallery exclaimed aloud, "Quite right, too, Samuel;
quite right. Put it down a we, my lord, put it down a we."

"Who is that that dares to address the court?" said the little judge,
looking up.

"I rayther suspect it was my father, my lord," replied Sam.

"Do you see him here now?" said the judge.

"No, I don't my lord," replied Sam, staring right up in the roof of the
court.

"If you could have pointed him out, I would have committed him
instantly," said the judge.

Sam bowed his acknowledgments.

"Now, Mr. Weller," said Sergeant Buzfuz, "I believe you are in the
service of Mr. Pickwick; speak up, if you please."

"I mean to speak up, sir," replied Sam. "I am in the service o' that
'ere gen'l'man, and a wery good service it is."

"Little to do, and plenty to get, I suppose?" said Sergeant Buzfuz.

"Oh, quite enough to get, sir, as the soldier said ven they ordered him
three hundred and fifty lashes," replied Sam.

"You must not tell us what the soldier said," interposed the judge,
"it's not evidence."

"Wery good, my lord."

"Now, Mr. Weller," said Sergeant Buzfuz, "do you recollect anything
particular happening on the morning when you were first engaged by the
defendant?"

"Yes, I do, sir. I had a reg'lar new fit-out o' clothes that mornin',
and that was a wery partickler and uncommon circumstance vith me in
those days."

"Do you mean to tell me, Mr. Weller, that you saw nothing of the
fainting of the plaintiff in the arms of the defendant?"

"Certainly not; I was in the passage till they called me up, and then
the old lady wasn't there."

"Have you a pair of eyes, Mr. Weller?"

"Yes, that's just it," replied Sam. "If they was a pair o' patent double
million magnifyin' gas microscopes of hextra power, p'raps I might be
able to see through a flight o' stairs and a d