from the
intellectual point of view, was the time when I tried, in a spirit of
dumb loyalty, to admire all the things that were said to be admirable.
Better spent was the time when I was finding out that much that had
received the stamp of the world's approval was not to be approved, at
least by me; best of all was the time when I was learning to appraise
the value of things to myself, and learning to love them for their own
sake and mine.

Respect of a deferential and constitutional type is out of place in art
and literature. It is a good enough guide to begin one's pilgrimage
with, if one soon parts company from it. Rather one must learn to give
honour where honour is due, to bow down in true reverence before all
spirits that are noble and adorable, whether they wear crowns and bear
titles of honour, or whether they are simple and unnoted persons, who
wear no gold on their garments.

Sincerity and simplicity! if I could only say how I reverence them, how
I desire to mould my life in accordance with them! And I would learn,
too, swiftly to detect the living spirits, whether they be young or
old, in which these great qualities reign.

For I believe that there is in life a great and guarded city, of which
we may be worthy to be citizens. We may, if we are blest, be always of
the happy number, by some kindly gift of God; but we may also, through
misadventure and pain, through errors and blunders, learn the way
thither. And sometimes we discern the city afar off, with her radiant
spires and towers, her walls of strength, her gates of pearl; and there
may come a day, too, when we have found the way thither, and enter in;
happy if we go no more out, but happy, too, even if we may not rest
there, because we know that, however far we wander, there is always a
hearth for us and welcoming smiles.

I speak in a parable, but those who are finding the way will understand
me, however dimly; and those who have found the way, and seen a little
of the glory of the place, will smile at the page and say: "So he, too,
is of the city."

The city is known by many names, and wears different aspects to
different hearts. But one thing is certain--that no one who has entered
there is ever in any doubt again. He may wander far from the walls, he
may visit it but rarely, but it stands there in peace and glory, the
one true and real thing for him in mortal time and in whatever lies
beyond.

II

ON GROWING OLDER

The sun flares