ichton of the
institution. What with men going off to the war and women going off to
make munitions, there were never-ending temporary gaps in the staff.
And there was never a gap that Mrs. Tufton did not triumphantly fill.
The pride of Betty, who had wrought this reformation, was simply
monstrous. If she had created a real live angel, wings and all, out of
the dust-bin, she could not have boasted more arrogantly. Being a
member of the Hospital Committee, I must confess to a bemused share in
the popular enthusiasm. And was I not one of the original discoverers
of Mrs. Tufton? When Marigold, inspired doubtless by his wife, from
time to time suggested disparagement of the incomparable woman, I
rebuked him for an arrant scandal-monger. There had been a case or two
of drunkenness at the hospital. Wounded soldiers had returned the worse
for liquor, an almost unforgivable offence.... Not that the poor
fellows desired to get drunk. A couple of pints of ale or a couple of
glasses of whisky will set swimming the head of any man who has not
tasted alcohol for months. But to a man with a septic wound or trench
nephritis or smashed up skull, alcohol is poison and poison is death,
and so it is sternly forbidden to our wounded soldiers. They cannot be
served in public houses. Where, then, did the hospital defaulters get
their drink?

"If I was you, sir," said Marigold, "I'd keep an eye on that there Mrs.
Tufton."

I instantly annihilated him--or should have done so had his
expressionless face not been made of non-inflammable timber. He said:
"Very good, sir." But there was a damnably ironical and insubordinate
look in his one eye.

Gradually the lady lapsed from grace. She got up late and complained of
spasms. She left dustpan and brush on a patient's bed. She wrongfully
interfered with the cook, insisting, until she was forcibly ejected
from the kitchen, on throwing lettuces into the Irish stew. Finally,
one Sunday afternoon, a policeman wandering through some waste ground,
a deserted brickfield behind Flowery End, came upon an unedifying
spectacle. There were madam and an elderly Irish soldier sprawling
blissfully comatose with an empty flask of gin and an empty bottle of
whisky lying between them. They were taken to the hospital and put to
bed. The next morning, the lady, being sober, was summarily dismissed
by the matron. Late at night she rang and battered at the door,
clamouring for admittance, which was refused. Then she w