his letter with a quotation from Browning's 'Lost Leader':

'Just for a handful of silver he left us,
Just for a ribbon to tie in his coat.'

"My hesitation disappeared at once, although it hurt me greatly to
carry out my resolution to return to Chicago. It cost me many a pang to
shock and hurt the dear good people, to seem so ungrateful for all their
love and kindness. But it had to be. I could not do otherwise. I
returned to Chicago two days after receiving the letter, and my lover
and I met and clasped hands and gazed into one another's eyes. We were
reunited, or rather united truly, for the first time, with better
understanding on both sides.

"Since that day, now six years ago, we have travelled the rough road
together, assisting one another as best we could, often stumbling and
misunderstanding and hurting one another, for we continually tried to
get deeper and deeper into real knowledge, real life, and it is hard to
reconcile all things. Generally to gain much, one must compromise, but
Terry and I did not wish to compromise. His and mine has been a
difficult and dangerous relation, but an interesting one. Very soon
after my return to Chicago, I felt much more at ease, no longer a
stumbling-block in his way; and I gained confidence, strength, and
knowledge. I met many people of the true communistic spirit, and by
social intercourse with them developed in every way. I continued to read
good books and attended lectures on the social problems of the day. So
after a time I became what is called an anarchist, just as Terry was.

"The reasons my books and companions brought forward for the
justification of anarchism were like meat and drink to me. I was filled
with enthusiasm for the ideas of a freedom which I now think is perhaps
impossible in our society. But I thought that the 'downtrodden,' the
'working classes,' held the fate of the world in their hands, if they
could but realise it. As time passed, my enthusiasm waned, for I began
to see many difficulties in the way of this beautiful idealism. At
times, I even doubted if the 'mob' were worthy of liberty at all. Such
thoughts, however, passed away whenever I saw the crowds of workers
streaming from the factories and stores, and looked upon their loutish,
brutal faces, wherein there was never a gleam of pride, of the joy of
creation, of intelligent effort. Then I would think, surely, surely,
humankind is not meant to be thus. Why, even the little birds,