bucket of
water from a green and slimy pond and put it on the other side of a
hedge, and there I retired to have a wash and change. I was just in
the midst of the process when, to my confusion, the Germans began to
shell the adjoining field, and splinters of shell fell in the hedge
behind me. The transport men on the other side called out to me (p. 076)
to run and take cover with them under the waggons. "I can't, boys",
I replied, "I have got no clothes on." They roared with laughter at my
plight. Though clothes are not at all an impregnable armour, somehow
or other you feel safer when you are dressed. There was nothing for it
but to complete my ablutions, which I did so effectually in the cold
spring air that I got a chill. That night I was racked with pains as I
rode on the horse which the M.O. lent me, on our march to Bailleul.

We arrived in the quaint old town about two in the morning, and I made
my way in the dark to the hotel in the Square. I was refused admission
on the reasonable plea that every bed was already occupied. I was just
turning away, wondering where I could go, for I was hardly able to
stand up, when an officer came out and said I might go up to a room on
the top storey and get into his bed as he would need it no more. It
was quite delightful, not only to find a bed, but one which had been
so nicely and wholesomely warmed. I spent a most uncomfortable night,
and in the morning I wondered if my batman would find out where I was
and come and look after me. About ten o'clock I heard a knock at the
door and called out "Come in." To my astonishment, a very smart staff
officer, with a brass hat and red badges, made his way into my room,
and startled me by saying, "I am the Deputy-Judge-Advocate-General."
"Oh", I said, "I was hoping you were my batman." He laughed at that
and told me his business. There had been a report that one of our
Highlanders had been crucified on the door of a barn. The Roman Catholic
Chaplain of the 3rd Brigade and myself had tried to trace the story to
its origin. We found that the nearest we could get to it was, that
someone had told somebody else about it. One day I managed to discover
a Canadian soldier who said he had seen the crucifixion himself. I at
once took some paper out of my pocket and a New Testament and told
him, "I want you to make that statement on oath and put your signature
to it." He said, "It is not necessary." But he had been talking so
much about the matte