he
began,--the poor are staunch sticklers for etiquette: I overheard a small
child explaining to her mother one night in Three Colts Street,
Limehouse, that she could not get into the house because there was a
"lady" on the doorstep, drunk,--"Signorina Ballatino, the
world-renowned--"

Here a voice from the gallery requested to know what had become of "Old
Joss," and was greeted by loud cries of "'Ear, 'ear."

The chairman, ignoring the interruption, continued:

"--the world-renowned performer on the zither--"

"On the whoter?" came in tones of plaintive inquiry from the back of the
hall.

"_Hon_ the zither," retorted the chairman, waxing mildly indignant; he
meant zithern, but he called it a zither. "A hinstrument well-known to
anybody as 'as 'ad any learning."

This sally was received with much favour, and a gentleman who claimed to
be acquainted with the family history of the interrupter begged the
chairman to excuse that ill-bred person on the ground that his mother
used to get drunk with the twopence a week and never sent him to school.

Cheered by this breath of popularity, our little president endeavoured to
complete his introduction of the Signorina. He again repeated that she
was the world-renowned performer on the zithern; and, undeterred by the
audible remark of a lady in the pit to the effect that she'd "never 'eard
on 'er," added:

"She will now, ladies and gentlemen, with your kind permission, give you
examples of the--"

"Blow yer zither!" here cried out the gentleman who had started the
agitation; "we want Joss Jessop."

This was the signal for much cheering and shrill whistling, in the midst
of which a wag with a piping voice suggested as a reason for the
favourite's non-appearance that he had not been paid his last week's
salary.

A temporary lull occurred at this point; and the chairman, seizing the
opportunity to complete his oft-impeded speech, suddenly remarked, "songs
of the Sunny South"; and immediately sat down and began hammering upon
the table.

Then Signora Ballatino, clothed in the costume of the Sunny South, where
clothes are less essential than in these colder climes, skipped airily
forward, and was most ungallantly greeted with a storm of groans and
hisses. Her beloved instrument was unfeelingly alluded to as a pie-dish,
and she was advised to take it back and get the penny on it. The
chairman, addressed by his Christian name of "Jimmee," was told to lie
down and let