ee a woman in man's close
Looks wusser nor the d---l.

Which is the opinion of your humbley sarvent,

HIRAM GREEN, ESQ.,

_Lait Gustise of the Peece._

* * * * *

FRESH FROM THE FLOWERY KINGDOM.

The world is justly indignant at the accounts of the Chinese massacres
of the missionaries who have perilled their lives in going so far to
teach them Christianity. Recently, for example, a young lady teacher
from Boston was so terribly stoned by some of the unregenerate little
pig-tailed fiends in Canton, that she died the next day. It is dreadful
to think how savage the instincts of the heathen are.

P.S.--Since the above was set up in type, MR. PUNCHINELLO has learned
that the Canton in which this occurrence took place is not in China, but
is a thriving village in Norfolk county, Massachusetts, about eighteen
miles from Boston, and that the assailants were consequently not
pig-tailed heathen, but genuine Christian children, who, in a few years,
will belong to the cultivated voters of Massachusetts. This action,
consequently, was not dictated by unregenerate barbarism, but was
intended simply as a protest (rough, we confess, but effectual, we
trust) against these new-fangled ideas of women's rights. What business
have women to be trying to teach? Let them stay at home, and if they
want to know anything, ask their husbands, there; and if they are
unmarried, let them wait until they get husbands. We must not let our
natural gallantry interfere with our reverence and respect for the
rights of ignorance, which will eventually vote.

* * * * *

A THRICE BLESSED CITY.

There is a city in Illinois called St. Genevieve. By some hocus-pocus
known to accomplished politicians, this city has had no Mayor since the
4th of June, 1867. In the absence of definite information upon the
subject, we take it for granted that St. Genevieve must be a most
delightful place to live in, and specially so, because, as we are
further informed, they have no Aldermen there either. More delightful
still, as there is nobody authorized to assess taxes, the fortunate
inhabitants do not pay any. Of course, if this state of primitive bliss
could last, Mr. PUNCHINELLO would make immediate arrangements to remove
to St. Genevieve; but the courts have ordered the citizens to elect a
Mayor immediately, so that this little heaven upon earth will soon have
ceased to exist.

*