ou nothing to say?"
"No," said Anstice resolutely, moving a step forward as he spoke. "On
such a subject I have nothing to say--to you. If, as seems possible, you
are suggesting that I should furnish either you or myself with an easy
solution of the problem of our respective lives, I fear I must decline
the suggestion. I'm a doctor, not a murderer, although"--suddenly he bit
his lip and his face turned grey--"you, of all men, may be pardoned for
thinking me ready to act as one."
The passing softness which had given him back his youth faded out of
Cheniston's face; and when he spoke even his voice sounded years older.
"Well, it's no use talking, I suppose. After all"--his lip curled--"no
man is dependent on another's good offices if he decides to cut short
his sojourn on this delightful planet. Though it strikes me that if, as
you say, you feel you owe me a debt, you might perhaps allow me to fix
the method of payment."
He stopped short, taken aback by Anstice's imperious gesture.
"Look here, Cheniston." He spoke curtly, his eyes ablaze. "Life has
given us both--me as well as you--a terrible jar. But you won't make
things better by resenting what has happened. You have lost the woman
you loved, but I have lost a good deal more. With the best
intentions"--he smiled ironically at his own phrase--"I have ruined your
life; and my own. I am ready to admit I owe you some reparation for the
wrong I have quite innocently done you; and I am ready, also, to pay you
any price in reason which you may ask, either now or in the future. But
the price must be one which may decently be paid."
"I see." Cheniston spoke slowly. "I think, after all, we may shelve the
question of payment between you and me. Personally I hope--you will
forgive my frankness--that we may never be called upon to meet again.
You see"--his voice broke, but he cleared his throat angrily and went
on--"I can't help remembering that if you had waited Miss Ryder would
still be alive."
Anstice was stung to a last impulse of self-defence.
"If I had waited--and the rescuers had not come, it is possible death
would have been a merciful alternative to Miss Ryder's fate," he said.
"I have tried to explain that what I did was done--as Miss Ryder would
be the first to admit--for the best. But I see you are determined to
look upon me as a criminal; and as I don't intend to excuse myself
further, well, I will echo your hope that we may never meet again."
And wi
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