e, the Grand Niger Junction, or Gold Coast and Timbuctoo (Provishnal)
Hatmospheric Railway came out four weeks ago: deposit ninepence per
share of 20L. (six elephant's teeth, twelve tons of palm-oil, or
four healthy niggers, African currency)--the shares of this helegeble
investment rose to 1, 2, 3, in the Markit. A happy man was Fred when,
after paying down 100 ninepences (3L. 15s.), he sold his shares for
250L. He gave a dinner at the 'Star and Garter' that very day. I promise
you there was no Marsally THERE.

"Nex day they were up at 3 1/4. This put Fred in a rage: they rose to 5,
he was in a fewry. 'What an ass I was to sell,' said he, 'when all this
money was to be won!'

"'And so you WERE an Ass,' said his partiklar friend, Colonel Claw,
K.X.R., a director of the line, 'a double-eared Ass. My dear fellow,
the shares will be at 15 next week. Will you give me your solemn word of
honor not to breathe to mortal man what I am going to tell you?'

"'Honor bright,' says Fred.

"'HUDSON HAS JOINED THE LINE.' Fred didn't say a word more, but went
tumbling down to the City in his Broom. You know the state of the
streets. Claw WENT BY WATER.

"'Buy me one thousand Hafricans for the 30th,' cries Fred, busting into
his broker's; and they were done for him at 4 7/8.

*****

"Can't you guess the rest? Haven't you seen the Share List? which
says:--

"'Great Africans, paid 9d.; price 1/4 par.'

"And that's what came of my pore dear friend Timmins's time-barging.

"What'll become of him I can't say; for nobody has seen him since. His
lodgins in Jerming Street is to let. His brokers in vain deplores his
absence. His Uncle has declared his marriage with his housekeeper; and
the Morning Erald (that emusing print) has a paragraf yesterday in the
fashnabble news, headed 'Marriage in High Life.--The rich and beautiful
Miss Mulligatawney, of Portland Place, is to be speedily united to
Colonel Claw, K.X.R.'

"JEAMES."

JEAMES ON THE GAUGE QUESTION.

"You will scarcely praps reckonize in this little skitch* the haltered
linimints of 1, with woos face the reders of your valluble mislny were
once fimiliar,--the unfortnt Jeames de la Pluche, fomly so selabrated
in the fashnabble suckles, now the pore Jeames Plush, landlord of the
'Wheel of Fortune' public house. Yes, that is me; that is my haypun
which I wear as becomes a publican--those is the checkers which
hornyment the pillows of my dor. I am like the Romin Genral, St.