a third glass of champagne, "we want ye to promise
us something."

"It will make us both happier," added the Signora.

"That ye will take warning," continued the O'Kelly, "by our wretched
example. Paul, in this world there is only one path to possible
happiness. The path of strict--" he paused.

"Propriety," suggested the Signora.

"Of strict propriety," agreed the O'Kelly. "Deviate from it," continued
the O'Kelly, impressively, "and what is the result?"

"Unutterable misery," supplied the Signora.

"Ye think we two have been happy here together," said the O'Kelly.

I replied that such was the conclusion to which observation had directed
me.

"We tried to appear so," explained the Signora; "it was merely on the
outside. In reality all the time we hated each other. Tell him, Willie,
dear, how we have hated each other."

"It is impossible," said the O'Kelly, finishing and putting down his
glass, "to give ye any idea, Kelver, how we have hated each other."

"How we have quarrelled!" said the Signora. "Tell him, dear, how we have
quarrelled."

"All day long and half the night," concluded the O'Kelly.

"Fought," added the Signora. "You see, Mr. Kelver, people in--in our
position always do. If it had been otherwise, if--if everything had been
proper, then of course we should have loved each other. As it is, it has
been a cat and dog existence. Hasn't it been a cat and dog existence,
Willie?"

"It's been just hell upon earth," murmured the O'Kelly, with his eyes
fixed gloomily upon the fire-stove ornament. Deadly in earnest though
they both were, I could not repress a laugh, their excellent intention
was so obvious. The Signora burst into tears.

"He doesn't believe us," she wailed.

"Me dear," replied the O'Kelly, throwing up his part with promptness and
satisfaction, "how could ye expect it? How could he believe that any man
could look at ye and hate ye?"

"It's all my fault," cried the little woman; "I am such a wicked
creature. I cannot even be miserable when I am doing wrong. A decent
woman in my place would have been wretched and unhappy, and made
everybody about her wretched and unhappy, and so have set a good example
and have been a warning. I don't seem to have any conscience, and I do
try." The poor little lady was sobbing her heart out.

When not shy I could be sensible, and of the O'Kelly and the Signora one
could be no more shy than of a pair of robin redbreasts. Besides, I was
really fond o