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em authentic. Then busts of fiendish ex-teachers and hatchet fanatics that pass as librarians giving me advanced nausea because my card has technically expired. Think the occasional gesture at remembering a swine or two from freeway driving might not be entirely out of place or that mindless clerks administering my life from afar and costing a future deserve an enshrining. "A nickel short," droned the bureaucrat, "no transfer," secures him passage to my waxworks. "Sorry," and "we'll certainly keep you in mind," as a litany of woe with its users made to memorize and make good all promises ever made. Wish the mind and her memories could be enlarged; I would recreate my own historic scenes to stand alongside Nelson's Death, the Little Princes in the Tower. Detail Israeli Nazi-hunters to track down my Adolf Eichmanns. Instead of samples from Jack the Ripper's handwriting in the waxworks, rejection slips and the stylized, flowery "we'll keep your application on file," would be served up as horror epics. Dunces that compose form letters made to live out the threadbare future promises. Each human roadblock making decisions out of ignorance would have his statement dutifully recorded before entering a world of his own design. Ad agency types made to explain in effortless detail to packed houses why their ketchup commercial should stand up. Crooked garage operators made to oil and grease the chassis of every car owner hoodwinked since the automobile began. Football made a crime punishable by fate. Shyster store owners too cheap to bag my newspaper made to launder all the soiled white pants across a lifetime. Tailors that mistakenly think they are being shortchanged and become vocal made to attend Sartre courses where "hell is other people," doctrines predominate. The huckster, the con-man, those who prey on the multitude transposed from whatever city of origin then made to tramp the streets of Toronto where every wrong syllable or misbegotten accent costs them a dollar of their savings. My whole museum a living aviary, a subway at rush hour where snotty, telephone receptionists are fed a steady diet of the Biblical injunction "by words they shall be known." Well meaning but ignorant people endlessly poking with the "you should smile more," placed in a house of mirrors with durable cassettes of Laugh-In. Belligerent
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