goose-quills or because
they could not get anything to eat; Antiquity scowled sulkily out of its
grave to see itself outdone, while even Posterity stood mute, gazing in
gaping ecstasy of retrospection on the eventful field.

The immortal deities, who whilom had seen service at the "affair" of
Troy, now mounted their feather-bed clouds and sailed over the plain, or
mingled among the combatants in different disguises, all itching to have
a finger in the pie. Jupiter sent off his thunderbolt to a noted
coppersmith to have it furbished up for the direful occasion. The noted
bully Mars stuck two horse-pistols into his belt, shouldered a rusty
firelock, and gallantly swaggered at the elbow of the Swedes as a
drunken corporal; while Apollo trudged in their rear as a bandy-legged
fifer, playing most villainously out of tune.

On the other hand, the ox-eyed Juno, who had gained a pair of black eyes
overnight in one of her curtain lectures with old Jupiter, displayed her
haughty beauties on a baggage wagon; while Vulcan halted as a
club-footed blacksmith lately promoted to be a captain of militia. All
was silent awe or bustling preparation: War reared his horrid front,
gnashed loud his iron fangs, and shook his direful crest of bristling
bayonets.

And now the mighty chieftains marshalled out their hosts. Here stood
stout Risingh, firm as a thousand rocks, incrusted with stockades, and
intrenched to the chin in mud batteries. He was a gigantic Swede, who,
had he not been rather knock-kneed and splay-footed, might have served
for the model of Samson or a Hercules. He was no less rapacious than
mighty, and withal as crafty as he was rapacious, so that there is very
little doubt that had he lived some four or five centuries since he
would have figured as one of those wicked giants who took a cruel
pleasure in pocketing beautiful princesses and distressed damsels when
gadding about the world, and locking them up in enchanted castles
without a toilet, a change of linen, or any other convenience; in
consequence of which enormities they fell under the high displeasure of
chivalry, and all true, loyal, and gallant knights were instructed to
attack and slay outright any miscreant they might happen to find above
six feet high; which is doubtless one reason why the race of large men
is nearly extinct, and the generations of latter ages are so exceedingly
small. His valiant soldiery lined the breastworks in grim array, each
having his mu