g money, instead of spending it, by buying Romulus and Remus, as I
already called them. At the same time, I should be gratifying my father
and my mother, and leading a higher and a nobler life. Even then I do
not know that I should have bought the pipes until the six months were
up, had I not been driven to it by jealousy. On my life, love for a pipe
is ever like love for a woman, though they say it is not so acute. Many
a man thinks there is no haste to propose until he sees a hated rival
approaching. Even if he is not in a hurry for the lady himself, he
loathes the idea of her giving herself, in a moment of madness, to
that other fellow. Rather than allow that, he proposes himself, and so
insures her happiness. It was so with me. Romulus and Remus were taken
from the window to show to a black-bearded, swarthy man, whom I
suspected of designs upon them the moment he entered the shop. Ah, the
agony of waiting until he came out! He was not worthy of them. I never
knew how much I loved them until I had nearly lost them. As soon as he
was gone I asked if he had priced them, and was told that he had. He was
to call again to-morrow. I left a deposit of a guinea, hurried home for
more money, and that night Romulus and Remus were mine. But I never
really loved them as I loved my brier.

[Illustration]

CHAPTER V.

MY TOBACCO-POUCH.

[Illustration]

I once knew a lady who said of her husband that he looked nice when
sitting with a rug over him. My female relatives seemed to have the
same opinion of my tobacco-pouch; for they never saw it, even in my own
room, without putting a book or pamphlet over it. They called it "that
thing," and made tongs of their knitting-needles to lift it; and when I
indignantly returned it to my pocket, they raised their hands to signify
that I would not listen to reason. It seemed to come natural to other
persons to present me with new tobacco-pouches, until I had nearly a
score lying neglected in drawers. But I am not the man to desert an old
friend that has been with me everywhere and thoroughly knows my ways.
Once, indeed, I came near to being unfaithful to my tobacco-pouch, and
I mean to tell how--partly as a punishment to myself.

[Illustration]

The incident took place several years ago. Gilray and I had set out on a
walking tour of the Shakespeare country; but we separated at Stratford,
which was to be our starting-point, because he would not wait for me. I
am more of a Shake