his
from vanity, because I owe it not to my being superior to, but different
from, others. I am sure that the remorse and affliction she feels now
are far greater than she would experience, even were she more guilty,
and with me. Then, at least, she would have some one to soothe and
sympathise in whatever she might endure. To one so pure as Emily, the
full crime is already incurred. It is not the innocent who insist upon
that nice line of morality between the thought and the action: such
distinctions require reflection, experience, deliberation, prudence of
head, or coldness of heart; these are the traits, not of the guileless,
but of the worldly. It is the reflections, not the person, of a virtuous
woman, which it is difficult to obtain: that difficulty is the safeguard
to her chastity; that difficulty I have, in this instance, overcome.
I have endeavoured to live without Emily, but in vain. Every moment of
absence only taught me the impossibility. In twenty-four hours I shall
see her again. I feel my pulse rise into fever at the very thought.

Farewell, Monkton. My next letter, I hope, will record my triumph.

BOOK III.

EXTRACTS FROM THE JOURNAL OF LADY EMILY MANDEVILLE.

Friday.--Julia is here, and so kind! She has not mentioned his name, but
she sighed so deeply when she saw my pale and sunken countenance, that
I threw myself into her arms and cried like a child. We had no need
of other explanation: those tears spoke at once my confession and my
repentance. No letter from him for several days! Surely he is not ill!
how miserable that thought makes me!

Saturday.--A note has just been brought me from him. He is come
back-here! Good heavens! how very imprudent! I am so agitated that I can
write no more.

Sunday.--I have seen him! Let me repeat that sentence--I have seen him.
Oh that moment! did it not atone for all that I have suffered? I
dare not write everything he said, but he wished me to fly with
him--him--what happiness, yet what guilt, in the very thought! Oh! this
foolish heart--would that it might break! I feel too well the sophistry
of his arguments, and yet I cannot resist them. He seems to have thrown
a spell over me, which precludes even the effort to escape.

Monday.--Mr. Mandeville has asked several people in the country to dine
here to-morrow, and there is to be a ball in the evening. Falkland is
of course invited. We shall meet then, and how? I have been so little
accustomed to disg