o ask what brought such a superannuated militaire
as I am,' said the count, 'from his retirement into this gay world
again. A relation of mine, who is one of our Ministry, knew that I
had some maps, and plans, and charts, which might be serviceable in an
expedition they are planning. I might have trusted my charts across
the channel, without coming myself to convoy them, you will say. But
my relation fancied--young relations, you know, if they are good for
anything, are apt to overvalue the heads of old relations--fancied that
mine was worth bringing all the way from Halloran Castle to London, to
consult with TETE-A-TETE. So you know, when this was signified to me by
a letter from the secretary in office, PRIVATE, MOST CONFIDENTIAL, what
could I do, but do myself the honour to obey? For though honour's voice
cannot provoke the silent dust, yet "flattery soothes the dull cold ear
of AGE."--But enough, and too much of myself,' said the count: 'tell
me, my dear lord, something of yourself. I do not think England seems to
agree with you so well as Ireland; for, excuse me, in point of health,
you don't look like the same man I saw some weeks ago.'

'My mind has been ill at ease of late,' said Lord Colambre.

'Ay, there's the thing! The body pays for the mind--but those who
have feeling minds, pain and pleasure altogether computed, have the
advantage; or at least they think so; for they would not change with
those who have them not, were they to gain by the bargain the most
robust body that the most selfish coxcomb, or the heaviest dunce extant,
ever boasted. For instance, would you now, my lord, at this moment
change altogether with Major Benson, or Captain Williamson, or even our
friend, 'Eh, really now, "pon honour"--would you!--I'm glad to see you
smile.'

'I thank you for making me smile, for I assure you I want it. I wish--if
you would not think me encroaching upon your politeness and kindness in
honouring me with this visit--You see,' continued he, opening the doors
of the back drawing-room, and pointing to large packages--'you see we
are all preparing for a march; my mother has left town half an hour
ago--my father engaged to dine abroad--only I at home--and, in this
state of confusion, could I even venture to ask Count O'Halloran to
stay and dine with me, without being able to offer him Irish ortolans or
Irish plums--in short, will you let me rob you of two or three hours
of your time? I am anxious to have your opi