uncertain how
to proceed. Then he had invented the excuse (which seemed to me at the
time, if you remember, to be quite inadequate) about the slight weekly
decline in the practice in order to get me out of it. His next move
was to persuade me to start for myself; and as this would be impossible
without money, he had encouraged me to it by the promise of a small
weekly loan. I remembered how he had told me not to be afraid about
ordering furniture and other things, because tradesmen gave long credit
to beginners, and I could always fall back upon him if necessary. He
knew too from his own experience that the landlord would require at
least a year's tenancy. Then he waited to spring his mine until I had
written to say that I had finally committed myself, on which by return
of post came his letter breaking the connection. It was so long and so
elaborate a course of deceit, that I for the first time felt something
like fear as I thought of Cullingworth. It was as though in the
guise and dress of a man I had caught a sudden glimpse of something
sub-human--of something so outside my own range of thought that I was
powerless against it.

Well, I wrote him a little note--only a short one, but with, I hope,
a bit of a barb to it. I said that his letter had been a source of
gratification to me, as it removed the only cause for disagreement
between my mother and myself. She had always thought him a blackguard,
and I had always defended him; but I was forced now to confess that she
had been right from the beginning. I said enough to show him that I
saw through his whole plot; and I wound up by assuring him that if he
thought he had done me any harm he had made a great mistake; for I had
every reason to believe that he had unintentionally forced me into the
very opening which I had most desired myself.

After this bit of bravado I felt better, and I thought over the
situation. I was alone in a strange town, without connections, without
introductions, with less than a pound in my pocket, and with no
possibility of freeing myself from my responsibilities. I had no one at
all to look to for help, for all my recent letters from home had given a
dreary account of the state of things there. My poor father's health and
his income were dwindling together. On the other hand, I reflected that
there were some points in my favour. I was young. I was energetic. I had
been brought up hard, and was quite prepared to rough it. I was well up
in m