l
maneuvering to perform. This I finally accomplished, however, with the
aid of Arletta, who revived occasionally from her comatose state long
enough to give a few indistinct directions, and then as my eyes rested
upon her lovely arms, neck and shoulders, I was plunged into ecstatic
emotion such as words have not the power to express. At last I succeeded
in loosening the stays and different cords and ribbons usually worn by
women, which alleviated her distress considerably, and after throwing a
light robe over her form was about to, arrange her position so that she
might rest comfortably, when to my utter astonishment she threw her arms
around my neck, kissed me several times, and whispered in my ear, "You
won't leave me alone tonight, will you, darling?"
This seemed to be almost too much for me to bear; the cravings of my
sensual nature began a desperate struggle with my better self. My blood
started to tingle with the heat of passion. Evil thoughts crowded
themselves into my brain. The more of these evil thoughts I allowed to
enter my head the less power of resistance I held against their subtle
ravages. I was losing self-control. I felt powerless to battle
successfully against the temptation. Stealthily walking over to the
door, I softly bolted it and then stood still for some time and
listened. It was past midnight and everything was quiet. I turned out
the light and started to go over to Arletta. As I did so, something
within me seemed to cry out with shame against such cowardice. As I
paused for a moment, the voice from within became stronger in its
disapproval of my intentions. Apparently I became divided into two
parts, and each was struggling for the mastery of me. One side was
trying with all its might to push me forward, while the other was
attempting to hold me back with reproachful warnings. These two parts
were my material and spiritual selves, contending for supremacy. I
wavered back and forth, from one to the other, and it seemed that the
material side was about to conquer and carry me down to disgrace, when
suddenly there passed through my mind like a great wave of strength the
Sagewoman's wonderful precept:
"Always consult your soul for advice.
"Do no act your conscience will not sanction."
And recognizing the full meaning of these words, I immediately turned
about, unbolted the door, and quietly left the apartment, feeling that
the soul was still master of my actions.
CHAPTER XXXI
Almost
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