t, near 's I c'n remember,
wa'n't it, Polly?"

"That's as near the truth as most o' the rest on't so fur," said Polly
with a sniff.

"Wa'al, I says to her," he proceeded, untouched by her scorn, "'How'd
you like to go t' the theater? You hain't never ben,' I says, 'an' now
you're down here you may jest as well see somethin' while you got a
chanst,' I says. Up to that _time_" he remarked, as it were in passing,
"she'd ben somewhat pre_juced_ 'ginst theaters, an'----"

"Wa'al," Mrs. Bixbee broke in, "I guess what we see that night was
cal'lated----"

"You hold on," he interposed. "I'm tellin' this story. You had a chanst
to an' wouldn't. Anyway," he resumed, "she allowed she'd try it once,
an' we agreed we'd go somewheres that night. But somethin' happened to
put it out o' my mind, an' I didn't think on't agin till I got back to
the hotel fer supper. So I went to the feller at the news-stand an'
says, 'Got any show-tickits fer to-night?'

"'Theater?' he says.

"'I reckon so,' I says.

"'Wa'al,' he says, 'I hain't got nothin' now but two seats fer
'Clyanthy.'

"'Is it a good show?' I says--'moral, an' so on? I'm goin' to take my
sister, an' she's a little pertic'ler about some things,' I says. He
kind o' grinned, the feller did. 'I've took my wife twice, an' she's
putty pertic'ler herself,' he says, laughin.'"

"She must 'a' ben," remarked Mrs. Bixbee with a sniff that spoke volumes
of her opinion of "the feller's wife." David emitted a chuckle.

"Wa'al," he continued, "I took the tickits on the feller's recommend,
an' the fact of his wife's bein' so pertic'ler, an' after supper we
went. It was a mighty handsome place inside, gilded an' carved all over
like the outside of a cirkis wagin, an' when we went in the orchestry
was playin' an' the people was comin' in, an' after we'd set a few
minutes I says to Polly, 'What do you think on't?' I says.

"'I don't see anythin' very unbecomin' so fur, an' the people looks
respectable enough,' she says.

"'No jail birds in sight fur 's ye c'n see so fur, be they?' I says. He,
he, he, he!"

"You needn't make me out more of a gump 'n I was," protested Mrs.
Bixbee. "An' you was jest as----" David held up his finger at her.

"Don't you sp'ile the story by discountin' the sequil. Wa'al, putty soon
the band struck up some kind of a dancin' tune, an' the curt'in went up,
an' a girl come prancin' down to the footlights an' begun singin' an'
dancin', an', scat my ----! to a