han't be a couple of minutes," she retorts. "You know, dear, it's
generally I who have to wait for you."

"But you've not got your boots on," the first woman reminds her.

"Well, they won't take ANY time," is the answer. "But of course, dear,
if you'd really rather I did not come, say so." By this time she is on
the verge of tears.

"Of course, I would like you to come, dear," explains the first in a
resigned tone. "I thought perhaps you were only coming to please me."

"Oh no, I'd LIKE to come," says the second woman.

"Well, we must hurry up," says the first; "I shan't be more than a
minute myself, I've merely got to change my skirt."

Half-an-hour later you hear them calling to each other, from different
parts of the house, to know if the other one is ready. It appears they
have both been ready for quite a long while, waiting only for the other
one.

"I'm afraid," calls out the one whose turn it is to be down-stairs,
"it's going to rain."

"Oh, don't say that," calls back the other one.

"Well, it looks very like it."

"What a nuisance," answers the up-stairs woman; "shall we put it off?"

"Well, what do YOU think, dear?" replies the down-stairs.

They decide they will go, only now they will have to change their boots,
and put on different hats.

For the next ten minutes they are still shouting and running about. Then
it seems as if they really were ready, nothing remaining but for them to
say "Good-bye," and go.

They begin by kissing the children. A woman never leaves her house
without secret misgivings that she will never return to it alive. One
child cannot be found. When it is found it wishes it hadn't been. It has
to be washed, preparatory to being kissed. After that, the dog has to be
found and kissed, and final instructions given to the cook.

Then they open the front door.

"Oh, George," calls out the first woman, turning round again. "Are you
there?"

"Hullo," answers a voice from the distance. "Do you want me?"

"No, dear, only to say good-bye. I'm going."

"Oh, good-bye."

"Good-bye, dear. Do you think it's going to rain?"

"Oh no, I should not say so."

"George."

"Yes."

"Have you got any money?"

Five minutes later they come running back; the one has forgotten her
parasol, the other her purse.

And speaking of purses, reminds one of another essential difference
between the male and female human animal. A man carries his money in his
pocket. When he wants to use it, he