-so fearfully severe and unapproachable, set up by my
own husband. Set up and acted upon by him. How could I ever attain it or
anything near it? Should I not be constantly shocking him by coarse,
gross notions as to the needlessness of this or that fine point of
conduct? by my ill-defined ideas as to a code of honor--my slovenly ways
of looking at questions?

It was such a fearful height, this to which he had carried his notions
and behavior in the matter of chivalry and loyalty. How was I ever to
help him to carry it out, and moreover, to bring up this child before
me, and perhaps children of my own in the same rules?

It was no doubt a much more brilliant destiny which actually awaited me
than any which I had anticipated--the wife of a nobleman, with the
traditions of a long line of noblemen and noblewomen to support, and a
husband with the most impossible ideas upon the subject.

I felt afraid. I thought of that poor, vain, selfish first wife, and I
wondered if ever the time might come when I might fall in his eyes as
she had fallen, for scrupulous though he was to cast no reproach upon
her, I felt keenly that he despised her, that had she lived, after that
dreadful discovery he would never have loved her again. It was awful to
think of. True, I should never commit forgery; but I might, without
knowing it, fail in some other way, and then--woe to me!

Thus dismally cogitating I was roused by a touch on my shoulder and a
kiss on the top of my head. Eugen was leaning over me, laughing.

"You have been saying your prayers so long that I was sure you must be
asking too much."

I confided some of my doubts and fears to him, for with his actual
presence that dreadful height of morality seemed to dwindle down. He was
human too--quick, impulsive, a very mortal. And he said:

"I would ask thee one thing, May. Thou dost not seem to see what makes
all the difference. I loved Vittoria: I longed to make some sacrifice
for her, would she but have let me. But she could not; poor girl! She
did not love me."

"Well?"

"Well! _Mein Engel_--you do," said he, laughing.

"Oh, I see!" said I, feeling myself blushing violently. Yes, it was
true. Our union should be different from that former one. After all it
was pleasant to find that the high tragedy which we had so wisely
planned for ourselves had made a _faux pas_ and come ignominiously to
ground.

CHAPTER XLI.

"And surely, when all this is past
They shall not w