he
background, and go quietly on at her business without notice, that she
could not at first believe in the great position offered to her. She
was considered worth so much money a year! It was wonderful.
After she had seen Mrs Leigh, and heard that it really was true and no
dream, another feeling began to take the place of wonder, and that was
perplexity. The choice, they told her, was to remain in her own hands,
and no one would interfere with it. What would be best? To go or stay?
It was very difficult, almost impossible, to decide. Never in her
short life had she yet been obliged to choose in any matter; there had
always been a necessity which she had obeyed: "Do this," "Go there."
The habit of obedience was strong within her, but it was very hard to be
suddenly called to act for herself. And the worst of it was that no one
would help her; even Mrs Leigh only said: "I shan't persuade you one
way or the other, Lilac, I shall leave it to you and your relations to
consider." Uncle Joshua had no counsel either. "You must put one
against the other and decide for yourself, my maid," he said; "there'll
be ups and downs wherever you go." She studied her aunt's face
wistfully, and found no help there. Mrs Greenways kept complete and
gloomy silence on the question.
Thrown back upon herself, Lilac's perplexity grew with each day. If she
went to sleep with her mind a little settled to one side of the matter,
she woke up next morning to see many more advantages on the other. To
leave Orchards Farm, and the village, and all the faces she had known
since she could remember anything, and go to strangers! That would be
dreadful. But then, there was the money to be thought of, and perhaps
she might find the strangers kinder than her own relations. "It's like
weighing out the butter," she said to herself; "first one side up and
then t'other." If only someone would say you _must_ go, or you _must_
stay.
During this week of uncertainty many things at the farm looked
pleasanter than they had ever done before, and she was surprised at the
interest everyone in the village took in her new prospects. They all
had something to say about them, and though this did not help her
decision but rather hindered it, she was pleased to find that they cared
so much for her.
"And so you're goin' away," said poor Mrs Wishing, fluttering into the
farm one day and finding Lilac alone. "Seems as if I was to lose the
on'y friend I'v
|