there is that gentleman who got into the train with you
on the blessed day that we first met. Mr Flamm, I think Mr Gresham said
his name was.

_Enter_ Flamm.

_Flamm_. Ah, Plumper, how are you, old man? I was looking for you
everywhere. Why, what have you done with Mrs Plumper and the children?

_Ad_. My mother and her little grandchildren, you mean. I was not aware
that they were to come here to-day.

_Fl_. Your mother! and grandchildren! Why, what the dev--- Oh, ah,
ahem! [_Aside_.] I see--mum's the word. Oh fie! sly dog! Naughty,
naughty!--but so nice! [_Whispers_.] You are quite safe with me.
[_Aloud_.] Yes, dear old lady--she's getting too old to walk much now.
[_Aside_.] I only hope we shan't meet the young one. A jolly row
there'll be!

_El_. I hope soon to have the pleasure of being introduced to Mr
Plumper's mother. I am sure I shall like her.

_Fl_. Oh, I am sure you will; she is the dearest, most delightful old
lady! [_Aside_.] At least I hope she is by this time, for she was a
horrid old cat up to the day of her death, ten years ago. By Jove! here
come Mrs Plumper and the young uns. Now for it!

_Enter_ Mrs Plumper.

_Mrs Plumper_. Why, Adolphus, where have you been? Excuse me, madam; I
did not see that you were upon my husband's arm. Perhaps he'll have the
goodness to present his wife to you.

_El_. His wife! her husband! [_Screams--faints_.]

_Mrs P_. Yes, madam. You may well scream, "His wife! her husband!" and
then pretend to faint. Who else's wife do you suppose I am?

_Ad_. I am sorry I have no time for explanation now, as I must attend to
this young lady; but if you will have the kindness to hold my hat, Mr
Flamm. [_Hands his hat to_ Flamm.] And you, madam, to take care of
these. [_Takes off his wig and spectacles and hands them to_ Mrs
Plumper.] Your own senses will explain a good deal. As you may have
already discovered, I am not Mr Plumper at all; in fact, I perceive him
approaching. Help me to hold her head a little higher, please Mr Flamm;
and Mrs Plumper, kindly undo the back of her dress, or her stays, or her
_chiton_, or whatever is underneath, and let go everything generally, so
as to give her a chance of breathing.

_Enter_ Plumper.

_Fl_. Here, Plumper, you're a medical man, just come in the nick of
time. This gentleman here has been personating you for some reason or
other, and the discovery caused the young lady to faint. Mysteri