istols, and thought of suicide--reflection alone restrained me. I
could not abandon the search after my father.

Feverish and impatient, I wished to walk out, but I dared not meet the
public eye. I waited till dark, and then I sallied forth, hardly knowing
where I went. I passed the gaming house--I did pass it, but I returned
and lost every shilling; not, however, till the fluctuations of the game
had persuaded me, that had I had more money to carry it on, I should have
won.

I went to bed, but not to sleep; I thought of how I had been caressed and
admired, when I was supposed to be rich. Of what use then was the money
I possessed? Little or none. I made up my mind that I would either gain
a fortune, or lose that which I had. The next morning I went into the
city, and sold out all the remaining stock. To Timothy I had not
communicated my intentions. I studiously avoided speaking to him; he felt
hurt at my conduct, I perceived, but I was afraid of his advice and
expostulation.

At night-fall I returned to the hell--played with various success; at
one time was a winner of three times my capital, and I ended at last
with my pockets being empty. I was indifferent when it was all gone,
although in the highest state of excitement while the chances were
turning up.

The next day I went to a house agent, and stated my wish to sell my
house, for I was resolved to try fortune to the last. The agent
undertook to find a ready purchaser, and I begged an advance, which he
made, and continued to make, until he had advanced nearly half the value.
He then found a purchaser (himself, as I believe) at two-thirds of its
value. I did not hesitate, I had lost every advance, one after another,
and was anxious to retrieve my fortune or be a beggar. I signed the
conveyance and received the balance, fifteen hundred and fifty pounds,
and returned to the apartments, no longer mine, about an hour before
dinner. I called Timothy, and ascertaining the amount of bills due,
gave him fifty pounds, which left him about fifteen pounds as a residue.
I then sat down to my solitary meal, but just as I commenced I heard a
dispute in the passage.

"What is that, Timothy?" cried I, for I was nervous to a degree.

"It's that fellow Emmanuel, sir, who says that he will come up."

"Yesh, I vill go up, sar."

"Let him come, Timothy," replied I. Accordingly Mr Emmanuel ascended.
"Well, Emmanuel, what do you want with me?" said I, looking with contempt
at t