he was equal to life;
that the world was sufficient for her; that she wanted the world; but
that the world was at conflict with God, and that she belonged to God,
and that she _should_ give herself utterly into his hands.

Moreover, she knew there was coming a time when the world, and Saratoga,
and the season, with its pleasures, would not do. There was grim
death!--he would come. She could not always get away. He was coming
every hour for somebody around her. She must--yes, she _must_ get ready
for him. It would not do to be surprised again as she had been surprised
last night. It was not becoming in Ruth Erskine to live so that the
sound of death could palsy her limbs and blanch her cheek and make her
shudder with fear. She must get where she could say calmly: "Oh, are
_you_ here? Well, I am ready."

It was just as the sun which was rising in glory forced its smiles in
between the thick leaves of the Chautauqua birds' nests, and set all the
little birds in a twitter of delight, that Ruth raised herself on her
elbow and said aloud, and with the force that comes from a determined
will that has decided something in which there has been a struggle:

"I _will_ do it."

CHAPTER XXIII.

"I'VE BEEN REDEEMED."

"What about Saratoga?" was Eurie's first query as she awoke to life and
talk again on that summer morning. "Do you think you will take the 10:50
train, Ruth?"

Ruth gave nothing more decided than a wan smile in answer, and in her
heart a wonder as to what Eurie would think of her if she could have
known the way in which her night was passed.

"She is more likely to stay in bed," Marion said, looking at her
critically. "You will never think of trying to travel to-day, will you,
Ruth? Dear me! how you look! I have always heard that hair oil was
weakening, but I did not know its effects were so sudden and
disastrous!" And then every one of these silly girls laughed. The
disaster of the night before had reached its irresistibly comic side--to
them. Only Ruth shivered visibly; it was not funny to her.

It was a very eventful day. She by no means relished the character of
invalid that the girls seemed determined ought to be forced upon her and
at the same time she had not the least idea of going to Saratoga.
Strangely enough, that desire seemed to have utterly gone from her. She
had not slept at all, but she arose and dressed herself as usual, with
only one feeling strong upon her, and that was a determinat