e, old thing, that you have been a
buffer between me, and--er--shall we say _circumstances_? and that I
never appreciated you properly until you had gone!

"You don't say much about your doings. Do you go to the theatres? I
suppose you can go to matinees, if it isn't proper to go alone at
night. Have you bought any clothes? You might look out for an
evening dress for me--white or pink--not blue this time, and not more
than three or four pounds. The Raynors and Beverleys have taken a
house together at the sea near good links. Dane is to join them for
part of the time, and I am asked for a day or two at the end of his
visit, so I need a new dress. The invitation came from Mrs Beverley.
I haven't once been asked to the Court since you left. Lady
Cassandra is dropping me now that she has her beloved Grizel.
Altogether I think her behaviour is rather _queer_. You would have
thought, after Dane staying there over a week, and getting so
intimate, as they must have done, that he would at least have been
asked to tea since he left, but not once! I asked him straight out,
so I know. He won't acknowledge that he thinks it odd--you know how
close men are.--but I can see he does from his manner. I shall go to
Gled Bay for his sake. He would be so disappointed if I refused. He
has given me a gold bangle, just the sort I like: a plain, flat band.
He looks thin still. Mother thinks he worried a great deal while I
was ill. Of course it was hard for him being tied by the leg
(literally!), and not able to do a thing for me. Dane doesn't say
much, but his feelings are awfully deep.

"I wonder if it isn't a mistake to conceal one's feelings? I'm
beginning to think that it is. We have been brought up to be
undemonstrative, but if I have children, I'll teach them quite
differently. What's the good of thinking nice things in your heart,
if the person you care for doesn't get the benefit? Mary! I'm sorry
I haven't been nicer to you. I'm sorry I was selfish, and let you do
so much. If it's any satisfaction to you to know it, I'm paying up
now! I do hope Dane will want to be married soon. I don't think I
can last out much longer. I have thought so often of what you told me
the night we were engaged, about your own love story, I mean. How
could you bear it, and live quietly on at home? I couldn't. If Dane
treated me like that, I should--marry Mr