meals in crowded restaurants, obliged to talk, obliged to
smile, and act the bridegroom's part. With a wince of pain he saw
himself and Teresa ensconced in a dream-like hotel on a dream-like
Italian lake, watching happy lovers wander about a garden of almost
unearthly beauty. Oh God, that beauty! How it would intensify every
longing; how hopelessly, maddeningly wretched a man might be, alone, in
Eden!
He did not speak, but his face spoke for him, and Teresa flushed and
winced. She had humbled her pride to the dust, but it was impossible
any longer to blind herself to the fact that for the time being her
influence over Dane was dead. He had no feeling left but the kindly
pity which was but another stab to her heart. Mind and heart alike were
so filled by another image that there was no loophole by which she could
enter in. For a bitter moment Teresa digested the fact, and faced the
truth. She had done her utmost and she had failed, there remained to
her but one hope--time! Given time and separation from the temptation
her chance might return, but for the present she must stand aside. One
more argument remained to her, and that she had hoped need not be made.
She braced herself now to deliver it.
"For Lady Cassandra's sake, it would be better if our engagement were
not broken off now, when we are staying in the same house. People have
noticed that you admire her. They might talk."
He looked up quickly, and stretched out an impetuous hand.
"That's good of you--to think of that! I wouldn't for the whole world
drag her name into it. They've no right to talk; I've given them no
cause, but if there's any fear... _Thank_ you, Teresa!"
His hand gripped hers, but for the first time the girl's fingers
remained limp and irresponsive in his grasp. She was horribly sore,
horribly wounded, her endurance was at an end, she wanted to get away to
her own room, and hide her head and cry. She rose and faced him with a
grave young dignity.
"I want you to understand that if she, Lady Cassandra, were free, I
would give you back your promise at once! You would not have needed to
ask me, I should have spoken myself; but if I set you free because you
love a married woman, I am helping you to--sin! I won't do it. You are
engaged to me, and I shall keep you to your promise. It isn't nice for
a girl to have to force herself upon a man. If I didn't love you I
couldn't do it, but I do love you, and I know that some
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