violent controversy broke out
between a pair of Australian soldiers on one side and almost the entire
ward on the other. The thing had started by one of the Anzacs venturing
the modest opinion that if Britain had had a million Australian troops,
they, the present gathering, would be 'hoch, hoching' in Berlin
(apparently a delightful prospect) instead of being cooped up in a London
hospital.

The little Cockney was just going to utter a crushing sarcasm, the
French-Canadian had taken in a perfectly stupendous breath, the
Highlander was calmly tasting the flavour of his own reply, when the
impending torrent was broken by the entrance of the chaplain, who wished
every one a somewhat sanctimonious 'Good-day.'

'I shall read,' he said, putting on a pair of glasses, 'the latest
_communique_ from the front. We have done very well. The news is quite
good--quite good. "_This morning, on a front of three miles, after an
intense artillery preparation, the Australians_"'----

''OORAY!' roared the Cockney.

The glasses popped off the chaplain's startled nose, and he just managed
by a brilliant bit of juggling to rescue them before they reached the
floor.

'I--I,' he ventured, smiling blandly, 'am delighted at your enthusiasm,
but you did not let me finish. "_This morning_"--um, um, ah--"_three
miles_"--um, um, yes--"_three miles, after an intense artillery
preparation, the Australians_"'----

''OORAY!' It was a deafening roar from the whole crowd.

'"_The Australians_"'----

'OORAY!'

'"_The_"'----

'Oo'----

Really, men, you must control yourselves. We are all glad and sustained
by any victory, however slight, but you must not give way to unmeaning
boisterousness. "_This morning, on a front of three miles, after an
intense artillery preparation, the Australians_"'----

There was a medley of submerged, prolonged snores. The chaplain looked
up indignantly. With the exception of Selwyn and the two Australians,
every one had followed the lead of the Cockney and disappeared underneath
the bed-clothes.

'This,' said the good man--'this frivolity at such a harrowing moment in
our country's destiny is neither seemly nor respectful. Cheerfulness is
admirable, until it descends to horseplay.'

With which parting salvo the worthy chaplain, who had never been to
France, and who was doing the best he could according to his clerical
upbringing, left his unruly flock, taking the _communique_ with him.

A little la