ied to conceal it
behind his own luggage. But Geraldine knows enough about hats to be able to
spot a hatbox, when put to it, through all the heavy canvas and all the
fancy labels in the world. So there was nothing more to be said about it;
and there was little more to be done about it except for George to go on
doing special messenger with it. The inner histories died down and, after a
brief silence, George affected to go to sleep.

I only woke him up once and that was to ask whether he cared to look after
the rest of my luggage for me.

When we got to Paris I explained to George that I had not meant to hurt his
feelings; there was no fellow I would more gladly entrust my odd jobs to.
Indeed Geraldine and I should want him to officiate in a similar capacity
at the coming ceremony.

A very satisfactory conclusion. I got Geraldine; Geraldine got her full
deserts--me; and if George had the misfortune to sit on the bag in the
taxi, what matter? Geraldine had acquiesced; after that who cared what
Geraldine's mother did, said, thought or wore?

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Small Boy_. "WHO'S THAT FAT MAN, DAD?"

_Dad_. "DON'T KNOW. HE LOOKS LIKE A PROFITEER."

_Small Boy_. "DON'T YOU THINK HE MUST BE ONE OF THE EXCESS PROFITEERS?"]

* * * * *

"Lady Clerk wanted for office work, with an engineering firm, a few
miles out of Leeds; also able to cook and serve a luncheon for the
principals."--_Yorkshire Paper._

If you want a cook nowadays you must employ a little diplomacy.

* * * * *

"During a discussion on over-crowded motor 'buses a member declared
that on one occasion 110 persons were found 'clinging like bees' to a
car certified to hold 0."--_Provincial Paper._

Some of these might have been accommodated in the bonnet.

* * * * *

"In Nepal His Highness shot what is believed to be the record tigress.
She was a most magnificent specimen, with a total length of 9 feet 7
inches--her body alone measuring 9 feet 5 inches."--_Indian Paper._

The record, of course, consisted in the brevity of her two-inch tail.

* * * * *

From Smith Minor's Scripture-paper:

"Abraham was the man who was very keen to go into the land of Israel
but he did not obey the word of the Lord, and the Lord's punishment to
him was to fo