urs, must have been brave. Everytime I
looked at him I thought of that ol saw "Faint heart never kissed the
chamber maid." When he finished everyone in the audience was "out"
exceptin an ol maid who was trying to send him a love message by eye
wireless.

After his batteries went dead on him we was invited to eat. It wuz the
first time I ever eat out in company with Skinny, and believe you me,
Julie, it'll be the last time while I am conscious. I'm not going to
try to tell you of all his breeches of etiket 'twould take too long,
but he pulled one that was a beaut. He kept mixing honey with his
peas; I kep kicking him under the table, and finally I got a chanct to
whisper "What in h---- was he doin that for?" He whispers back "How am
I gonna make 'em stay on my knife if I dont mix 'em with sumpin."

Yours until country bording houses quit using canned vegtabils.

BARNEY.

Dere Julie:--

When the Kaiser is canned and I get back to the ol' job, eatin my 3 a
day, and holdin your hand in the movies at nite, I'm gonna try fer the
vaudeville. We have formed a quartet in our company, and we must be
pretty good fer up to the present nobody has fired anything at us but
remarks. Skinny tried to git in by telling us his voice was trained;
the top sarge sed he guessed it was trained all-rite, all-rite,
but he must of trained it selling strawberries. We have a little
Yiddish feller in it too, You know, Julie, the one who slips me his
bacon every mornin; when he ain't soldierin, he runs a little gents
furnishin store on 8th Avenoo; he's some warbler too, but persists in
allus wantin to sing "Keep the home fires Burnin." Well Julie, if he
has ten thou. insurance on that joint of his, as he sez he has, no
wonder he wants to "keep the home fires burnin." He's all business
this little Jewish guy. Skinny sez if he was shiprecked on a deserted
eyeland he would get up the next morning and try to sell a map of the
eyeland to the natives. He's a good business feller too. He rote a
song once, fer a big vaudeville actor, and the actor wrote Izzy to
send it along and if it was good he would send a check. Izzy wired
back to send the check, if it was good, he'd send the song.

Well Julie, I'd like to see your little blonde bean just about now.
Believe you me, Julie, me for the blondes every time. Skinny says that
brunettes is the most popular; well maybe he's right; ennyhow his girl
has been both, so I suppose he knows. I don't know whe