Daigaku," not one word is said about love. It may be
stated at once that love between husband and wife is almost as
conspicuously lacking in practice as in precept. In no regard,
perhaps, is the contrast between the East and the West more striking
than the respective ideas concerning woman and marriage. The one
counts woman the equal, if not the superior of man; the other looks
down upon her as man's inferior in every respect; the one considers
profound love as the only true condition of marriage; the other thinks
of love as essentially impure, beneath the dignity of a true man, and
not to be taken into consideration when marriage is contemplated; in
the one, the two persons most interested have most to say in the
matter; in the other, they have the least to say; in the one, a long
and intimate previous acquaintance is deemed important; in the other,
the need for such an acquaintance does not receive a second thought;
in the one, the wife at once takes her place as the queen of the home;
in the other, she enters as the domestic for her husband and his
parents; in the one, the children are hers as well as his; in the
other, they are his rather than hers, and remain with him in case of
divorce; in the one, divorce is rare and condemned; in the other, it
is common in the extreme; in the one, it is as often the woman as the
man who seeks the divorce; in the other, until most recent times, it
is the man alone who divorces the wife; in the one, the reasons for
divorce are grave; in the other, they are often trivial; in the one,
the wife is the "helpmate"; in the other, she is the man's
"plaything"; or, at most, the means for continuing the family lineage;
in the one, the man is the "husband"; in the other, he is the "danna
san" or "teishu" (the lord or master); in the ideal home of the one,
the wife is the object of the husband's constant affection and
solicitous care; in the ideal home of the other, she ever waits upon
her lord, serves his food for him, and faithfully sits up for him at
night, however late his return may be; in the one, the wife is
justified in resenting any unfaithfulness or immorality on the part of
her husband; in the other, she is commanded to accept with patience
whatever he may do, however many concubines he may have in his home or
elsewhere; and however immoral he may be, she must not be jealous. The
following characterization of the women of Japan is presumably by one
who would do them no injustice,