ey are "Hail,
fellow, well met" with every Tom, Dick, or Harry that they come
across. When I meet a dog of my acquaintance I slap his head, call him
opprobrious epithets, and roll him over on his back; and there he lies,
gaping at me, and doesn't mind it a bit.

Fancy carrying on like that with a cat! Why, she would never speak to
you again as long as you lived. No, when you want to win the approbation
of a cat you must mind what you are about and work your way carefully.
If you don't know the cat, you had best begin by saying, "Poor pussy."
After which add "did 'ums" in a tone of soothing sympathy. You don't
know what you mean any more than the cat does, but the sentiment
seems to imply a proper spirit on your part, and generally touches her
feelings to such an extent that if you are of good manners and passable
appearance she will stick her back up and rub her nose against you.
Matters having reached this stage, you may venture to chuck her under
the chin and tickle the side of her head, and the intelligent creature
will then stick her claws into your legs; and all is friendship and
affection, as so sweetly expressed in the beautiful lines--

"I love little pussy, her coat is so warm,
And if I don't tease her she'll do me no harm;
So I'll stroke her, and pat her, and feed her with food,
And pussy will love me because I am good."

The last two lines of the stanza give us a pretty true insight into
pussy's notions of human goodness. It is evident that in her opinion
goodness consists of stroking her, and patting her, and feeding her with
food. I fear this narrow-minded view of virtue, though, is not confined
to pussies. We are all inclined to adopt a similar standard of merit in
our estimate of other people. A good man is a man who is good to us, and
a bad man is a man who doesn't do what we want him to. The truth is,
we each of us have an inborn conviction that the whole world, with
everybody and everything in it, was created as a sort of necessary
appendage to ourselves. Our fellow men and women were made to admire us
and to minister to our various requirements. You and I, dear reader, are
each the center of the universe in our respective opinions. You, as I
understand it, were brought into being by a considerate Providence in
order that you might read and pay me for what I write; while I, in your
opinion, am an article sent into the world to write something for you
to read. The stars--as we ter