long: so many events and such divers impressions crowd a lifetime into a
few days! New emotions have given birth to a new nature; my dreams as a
young girl have been surpassed, or rather have become a serious reality.
Sunday, _January 5th_.
Would any one believe it? During the whole of yesterday I thought
neither of balls, nor of fetes, not even of the prince royal himself: my
mind was exclusively filled with my sister. She came sooner than had
been expected, and was taken ill immediately after her arrival. The
princess was sent for, and hastened to Barbara to remain all day. I
desired to accompany her, but was not permitted. Until midnight I was in
a horrible state of uneasiness; I sent to three churches to have masses
said. Finally, at one o'clock, the princess returned; she told me that
Barbara was doing well, and had given birth to a daughter. This morning
I begged the princess to permit me to visit my sister, but she replied
that I could not do so, as it was not proper for a young girl to visit a
lady in Barbara's situation. There was nothing to be said, and so I must
wait.
The starost called here for a moment; he seemed very, very happy. They
say the little one is charming, red and white, and so plump; she is to
be called Angelica, to please our mother, who is so named. Oh! if I
could only see the dear child! I have all the honor of being an aunt,
without any of the pleasure.
The prince royal sent to congratulate the princess upon the birth of the
little girl, and he was kind enough to inquire after me by the same
messenger.
Wednesday, _January 8th_.
My sister improves daily, but she does not yet leave her bed. I have
seen the prince royal but once this week; he had gone hunting with the
king; but yesterday he amply indemnified us by making us a visit of at
least an hour. How good he must be! how tenderly he loves his father!
and when he spoke of his mother, his eyes were wet with tears. He seems
excellently well disposed toward the Poles; I do not think, so far as I
can judge, that a more noble and energetic soul could anywhere be found.
All that I had heard of him, all that I had written in my journal, is
the most exact truth. He is even far above all the praises bestowed upon
him; no one could describe the tone of his voice, his smile, or the
expression of his eye, so filled with deep and noble thought; I am not
at all surprised at the empress's predilection for him. He has already
succeede
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