ttitude
toward the deaf child that differs from that maintained by sensible
mothers toward their other children. They often set up a different
standard of conduct and of obligation for the afflicted child. His
brothers and sisters are taught to always defer to his wishes; even to
the extent of yielding to improper and selfish demands on his part, and
conceding that they have no rights where he is concerned. He is not
required to perform the little duties demanded of the other children. He
is given privileges which the others do not, and which no one of them,
including himself, should enjoy. He grows tyrannical, domineering, and
selfish. The mother says: "Poor little chap; he has trouble enough, we
must do all in our power to make up to him for what he misses by reason
of his deafness." This is, however, a shortsighted, and really a cruel
policy. It lays up much misery for his future, and in the end proves a
serious handicap to one who needs to have as few additional difficulties
as possible. Though it may seem hard-hearted, it is really kinder to put
him on the same basis as any other child. Make him do everything
possible for himself. Insist upon his being independent; dressing
himself as soon as he is able, buttoning his own shoes, and performing
all the little self-help acts that the wise mother demands of all her
children. Make no distinction in the treatment accorded him. Ask the
same services, reward right actions and punish wrongdoing as impartially
as if he was not deaf, only being sure that he clearly connects the
punishment with the wrong act. This, in the case of a deaf child,
requires a little more care than with a hearing child. Train him to be
thoughtful for the comfort of others, and respectful of their rights,
just as you insist that the others observe his rights. He cannot be
argued with, object lessons and example must be the means of teaching
him manners and morals.

XII

CULTIVATING THE SOCIAL INSTINCT

Between the ages of two and four years all the games and exercises
heretofore described can continue to be used, together with others
increasingly difficult and complicated, as the child's mind develops and
his powers of observation, attention, and memory increase. Take very
special care that he learns all the childhood games that other children
know and enjoy. Devote yourself more to him in this respect than you
would in the case of another child. Encourage the neighbors' children to
come