f piety here
and there, I would be glad to print it in my next volume of hymns."

Mr. H.B. Smith: "I did not suppose that our reverend Brother
Gunsaulus ever attempted poetry. His verses have that grace and lilt
that are the prime essentials to successful comic-opera libretto
writing. When I want a collaborateur, I shall know whom to apply
to."

Mr. Bristol: "The brother's poem indicates the influence of the
Homer school. Can it be possible that our Plymouth Church friend has
fallen into the snare spread for him by the designing members of the
South Side Hellenic organization?"

Dr. Gunsaulus: "Since Brother Bristol seems so anxious to know, I
will admit that I have recently joined the Armour Commandery of the
South Side Sons of Homer."

Mr. Slason Thompson, heading off the discussion threatened by Mr.
Gunsaulus's declaration, arose and informed the company that he was
prepared to confer an inestimable boon upon his brother Saints and
brother Sinners. "You are all," said he, "victims to an exacting and
fierce mania--a madness that is unremitting in the despotism
directing every thought and practice in your waking hours, and
filling your brains with gilded fancies during your nocturnal
periods of repose. (Applause.) Many of you are so advanced in this
mania that the mania itself has become seemingly your very
existence--(cheers)--and the feet of others are fast taking hold
upon that path which leads down into the hopeless depths of this
insanity. (Prolonged applause.) Hitherto bibliomania has been
regarded as incurable; humanity has looked upon it as the one malady
whose tortures neither salve, elixir, plaster, poultice, nor pill,
can ever alleviate; it has been pronounced immedicable, immitigable,
and irremediable.

"For a long time," continued Mr. Thompson. "I have searched for an
antidote against this subtle and terrific poison of bibliomania. At
last, heaven be praised! I have found the cure! (Great sensation.)
Yes, a certain remedy for this madness is had in Keeley's bichloride
of gold bibliomania bolus, a packet of which I now hold in my hand!
Through the purging and regenerating influences of this magic
antidote, it is possible for every one of you to shake off the evil
with which you are cursed, and to restore that manhood which you
have lost in your insane pursuit of wretched book fancies. The
treatment requires only three weeks