s acting much as those persons do who stop a physician in
the street to talk with him about their livers or stomachs, or other
internal arrangements, instead of going to his office and consulting him,
expecting to pay for his advice. Others are more like those busy women
who, having the generous intention of making a handsome present to their
pastor, at as little expense as may be, send to all their neighbors and
acquaintances for scraps of various materials, out of which the imposing
"bedspread" or counterpane is to be elaborated.

That is all very well so long as old pieces of stuff are all they call
for, but it is a different matter to ask for clippings out of new and
uncut rolls of cloth. So it is one thing to ask an author for liberty to
use extracts from his published writings, and it is a very different
thing to expect him to write expressly for the editor's or compiler's
piece of literary patchwork.

I have received many questions within the last year or two, some of which
I am willing to answer, but prefer to answer at my own time, in my own
way, through my customary channel of communication with the public. I
hope I shall not be misunderstood as implying any reproach against the
inquirers who, in order to get at facts which ought to be known, apply to
all whom they can reach for information. Their inquisitiveness is not
always agreeable or welcome, but we ought to be glad that there are
mousing fact-hunters to worry us with queries to which, for the sake of
the public, we are bound to give our attention. Let me begin with my
brain-tappers.

And first, as the papers have given publicity to the fact that I, The
Dictator of this tea-table, have reached the age of threescore years and
twenty, I am requested to give information as to how I managed to do it,
and to explain just how they can go and do likewise. I think I can lay
down a few rules that will help them to the desired result. There is no
certainty in these biological problems, but there are reasonable
probabilities upon which it is safe to act.

The first thing to be done is, some years before birth, to advertise for
a couple of parents both belonging to long-lived families. Especially let
the mother come of a race in which octogenarians and nonagenarians are
very common phenomena. There are practical difficulties in following out
this suggestion, but possibly the forethought of your progenitors, or
that concurrence of circumstances which we call accid