"
"Robert--"
"No! He has Jean, and she has his heart, but he wants her to be
stronger; he wants to be richer for her sake. He craves for the
perfection which he can never know."
But it was hard to be always strong, to be compelled to reason and
argue, and fight down self, instead of claiming her woman's privilege of
being cared for and protected. There were hours when Vanna would have
given all she possessed to break down and cry her heart out in Piers's
arms; but it was an indulgence she dared not claim. A fuller knowledge
of her lover's character had shown that his powers of endurance were
less than her own. He would have been all tenderness and compassion,
but she would have paid for that hour by weeks of heavy depression. So
Vanna fought on, and was silent.
In one respect her circumstances were happier than her lover's; for
while Piers's interest in business was of the perfunctory order of the
already rich man, her own work was a continual delight. From time to
time she visited a patient, but by far the greater number came to her to
be housed and tended. They were a pathetic crowd; middle-aged and
elderly women of gentle birth, worn out with the struggle of life,
shrinking with terror from bodily illness, not because of the suffering
involved, but from the fear of loss of employment and subsequent want
which it involved. To be nursed, housed, and fed free of charge was a
godsend indeed, and Jean's prophecy of ingratitude was rarely fulfilled.
Sometimes, indeed, Vanna felt that ingratitude would have been easier
to bear than the trembling blessings called down on her head by those
poor souls for whom perforce she could do so little. She grew to dread
the last few days of a visit, to shrink afore-hand from the pitiful
glances which the departing guest would cast around the pretty, cosy
rooms, as if storing up memories to brighten barren days. Her charity
had the sting of all such work, the inability to do more; but in it she
found interest and occupation, and a continual object-lesson. These
poor waifs and strays, who were thankful for a few weeks' haven, would
think themselves rich beyond measure if they owned one half the
blessings she herself possessed. Ought she not to be grateful too?
On this autumn afternoon Jean had an exciting piece of news to tell to
her visitors.
"Guess who is engaged! Some one you know--know very well: an intimate
friend."
"Fine or superfine?"
"Both, of cour
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